The Snowman Reviews

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October 26, 2017
[The Snowman] is two hours of uninterrupted, snow-caked boredom.
October 26, 2017
... the movie itself is an inept misfire - the kind of entrancing train wreck that makes you long for a behind-the-scene tell-all to explain what, exactly, went so wrong.
October 26, 2017
How did a delicious Scandinavian noir novel go so spectacularly wrong on screen?
Top Critic
October 23, 2017
Not a single scene works as anything more than a total waste of good film.
October 23, 2017
With a perplexing tale and some very odd creative choices, it's so easy to laugh at The Snowman, but this kind of tale shouldn't inspire laughter.
October 23, 2017
In this soul-deadening freeze, who wouldn't seek solace in a bottle? Or in the physical warmth of a lover's arms? Or in mass murder?
October 21, 2017
One of the most shockingly awful wastes of talent imaginable, this adaptation of Jo Nesbo's thriller is mostly incoherent and, just when it starts to make sense, it is hijacked by a series of laughably bad clichs.
October 20, 2017
A twisty tale of inexplicable red herrings, baffling plot detours, and Chloe Sevigny as not one but two identical chicken farmers.
October 20, 2017
The movie plays as if he threw in the towel in the editing room. It's a stiff.
October 20, 2017
It's bad. A bit of a full-on Nesbner, in fact.
October 20, 2017
It's a pity, because there's some squirmy vitality in the hothouse premise.
October 20, 2017
That look isn't enough to overcome a sluggish pace and increasingly implausible plot. Frozen red herrings are still red herrings.
October 20, 2017
Completely, atrociously, perhaps even impressively, stupid.
October 20, 2017
Playground snowball fights have more suspense and intrigue than "The Snowman," the most puzzlingly bad movie of the year.
October 19, 2017
"The Snowman" is ugly and nasty, but that's not the worst of it. The worst is that it's boring and makes no sense.
October 19, 2017
"The Snowman" is like if aliens studied humanity and tried to make their own movie in an attempt to communicate with us.
Top Critic
October 19, 2017
Its lapses would be more forgivable if the plotting served some larger purpose, like exposing municipal corruption in Oslo's government, but Chinatown this is not.
October 19, 2017
Such abundant talent, yet what we get on the screen is like a snow cone made with horse urine.
October 19, 2017
Dreary as a Nordic winter, and almost as long.
October 19, 2017
This adaptation is so sloggy it feels like wading through thigh-deep snowfall, stained scarlet from all the gratuitous gore.
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