Michael Cera

Michael Cera

Highest Rated: 94% Juno (2007)

Lowest Rated: 14% Year One (2009)

Birthday: Jun 07, 1988

Birthplace: Brampton, Ontario, Canada

Canadian actor Michael Cera made his first major impact on American comedy audiences with his role as teenager George Michael Bluth who, at first blush, seemed the most normal of the terminally dysfunctional Bluth clan, on the cult TV comedy "Arrested Development" (Fox, 2003-06). As the series unfolded, however, his character's burning and inappropriate crush on his own cousin proved the actor's willingness to explore the most uncomfortable comic situations imaginable, and paved the way for future film roles as painfully awkward types. Cera's first leading film role was the broad comedy "Superbad" (2007), which paired him to great success with Jonah Hill as a pair of teenage outcasts. Following major critical kudos for the surprising indie breakout "Juno" (2007), Cera had officially arrived as a new kind of dry-witted comic lead. He further cemented his growing reputation as a Gen-Y Woody Allen in projects like "Nick and Nora's Infinite Playlist" (2008), although such disappointments as "Year One" (2009) and "Scott Pilgrim vs. the World" (2010) took some of the shine off his glowing résumé. His return to "Arrested Development" (Netflix, 2013- ), however, gave fans of the actor cause to celebrate and portended a second act to his still-young career. Clearly more than a comedic flash-in-the-pan, Cera was a talent whose true range had yet to be explored in any number of mediums and genres.

Photos

Highest Rated Movies

Filmography

Movies

Credit
No Score Yet No Score Yet Blazing Samurai Hank (Voice) - 2021
91% 46% Gloria Bell Peter (Character) $5.6M 2018
60% 32% Tyrel Alan (Character) $18.2K 2018
39% 61% How to Be a Latin Lover Remy (Character) $32.1M 2017
52% No Score Yet Person to Person Phil (Character) $48.3K 2017
90% 80% The LEGO Batman Movie Robin/Dick Grayson (Voice) $175.7M 2017
81% 84% Molly's Game Player X (Character) $28.7M 2017
56% 32% Lemon Alex (Character) $29.1K 2017
82% 50% Sausage Party Barry (Voice) $97.7M 2016
83% 46% Entertainment Tommy (Character) $55.5K 2015
No Score Yet 89% Burning Love 2 Wally (Character) - 2014
35% 50% Hits Bennie (Character) - 2014
No Score Yet No Score Yet Gregory Go Boom Gregory (Character) - 2013
No Score Yet 67% Brazzaville Teen-Ager Gunther (Character),
Director,
Screenwriter
- 2013
83% 50% Crystal Fairy & the Magical Cactus Jamie (Character) $187.5K 2013
68% 30% Magic Magic Brink (Character) - 2013
83% 71% This Is the End Himself (Character) $101.5M 2013
59% 47% The End of Love Michael (Character) $8.3K 2012
No Score Yet No Score Yet Bright Day! Himself (Character) - 2010
82% 84% Scott Pilgrim vs. the World Scott Pilgrim (Character) $31.5M 2010
66% 52% Youth in Revolt Nick Twisp (Character) $15.3M 2009
14% 23% Year One Oh (Character) $43.3M 2009
60% 45% Paper Heart Himself (Character),
Original Music
$1.3M 2009
75% 65% Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist Nick (Character) $31.5M 2008
No Score Yet 18% Extreme Movie Fred (Character) - 2008
94% 88% Juno Paulie Bleeker (Character) $143.5M 2007
88% 87% Superbad Evan (Character) $121.5M 2007
No Score Yet No Score Yet Wayside School Todd (Character) - 2005
No Score Yet 75% Walter and Henry Crying Kid (Character) - 2001
No Score Yet 60% My Louisiana Sky Jesse Wade Thompson (Character) - 2001
No Score Yet 33% The Familiar Stranger Young Ted Welsh (Character) - 2001
No Score Yet No Score Yet Custody of the Heart Johnny Raphael (Character) - 2000
70% 81% Frequency Gordie Jr. (10 Years) (Character) $45M 2000
No Score Yet No Score Yet Ultimate G's: Zac's Flying Dream Zac Bernier (Character) - 2000
No Score Yet 62% What Katy Did Dorry Carr (Character) - 1999

TV

Credit
75% 81% Arrested Development George Michael Bluth (Character) 2018-2019 2013 2003-2006
No Score Yet No Score Yet JASH Presents Gunther (Character) 2017
No Score Yet No Score Yet Twin Peaks: The Return Wally Brando (Guest Star) 2017
No Score Yet No Score Yet etalk Guest 2017
No Score Yet No Score Yet Dish Nation Guest 2017
No Score Yet 78% Drunk History Unknown (Guest Star) 2015-2016 2013
No Score Yet 91% Comedy Bang! Bang! Guest 2015
No Score Yet 95% Louie Young Man (Guest Star) 2015
No Score Yet 58% The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon Guest 2014
No Score Yet No Score Yet Today Guest 2014
No Score Yet No Score Yet Row J Guest 2014
No Score Yet 75% Late Show With David Letterman Guest 2014
No Score Yet No Score Yet Saturday Night Live Unknown (Guest Star) 2014
85% 77% The Simpsons Nick (Guest Voice) 2012
No Score Yet No Score Yet Conan Guest 2010
No Score Yet No Score Yet Late Night With Jimmy Fallon Guest 2010
No Score Yet No Score Yet Made in Hollywood Guest 2010 2008
No Score Yet No Score Yet ES.TV Guest 2009-2010
No Score Yet No Score Yet Entertainers: With Byron Allen Guest 2009-2010
No Score Yet No Score Yet The Tonight Show With Conan O'Brien Guest 2010
No Score Yet No Score Yet The Early Show Guest 2009
No Score Yet No Score Yet Jimmy Kimmel Live! Guest 2009
No Score Yet No Score Yet Late Night With Conan O'Brien Guest 2008
No Score Yet No Score Yet Between Two Ferns Guest 2008
No Score Yet No Score Yet Lunar Jim Rover (Voice) 2006
92% 79% Veronica Mars Unknown (Guest Star) 2006
No Score Yet No Score Yet The Berenstain Bears Unknown (Voice) 2003-2004
No Score Yet No Score Yet The Grubbs Unknown (Character)

QUOTES FROM Michael Cera CHARACTERS

Michael Cera says: Everybody listen up! Who took my fucking cell phone man? Martin, empty your pockets!

Martin Starr says: What?

Michael Cera says: I saw you in the bathroom, man! Somebody dial my phone! Unbelievable! Unacceptable, after coke I wasted on you people, thrown away!

Seth Rogen says: *Street light starts falling* Whoa, whoa!

Seth Rogen says: Whoa, whoa!

Michael Cera says: *Street light impales Micheal and lifts him up* *He pulls out his ringing phone* Shit, that's embarrassing

Michael Cera says: Shit, that's embarrassing

Todd says: You're not going to hit me are you!?

Todd says: You're not going to hit me are you?

Scott Pilgrim says: Dude, what do you know about Romana Flowers??

Scott Pilgrim says: Dude, what do you know about Romana Flowers?

Comeau says: All I know is that she's American.

Scott Pilgrim says: *sigh* Americann...

Scott Pilgrim says: American...

Scott Pilgrim says: What is the website for Amazon.ca ?

Scott Pilgrim says: What is the website for Amazon.ca?

Wallace Wells says: Amazon.ca..

Wallace Wells says: Amazon.ca.

Nick Twisp/Francois says: I do all my hiking free form. Like John Muir, I enter the wilderness with nothing more than my journal and a child-like sense of wonder.

Seth says: I am truly jealous you got to suck on those tits when you were a baby.

Evan says: Yeah, well, at least you got to suck on your dad's dick.

Evan says: I heard she got breast reduction surgery.

Seth says: What? That's like slapping God across the face for giving you a beautiful gift.

Evan says: She had back problems, man.

Fogell says: You still haven't told him that we're rooming together?

Evan says: Fogell, shut the fuck up. And take off that vest. You look like Aladdin.

Scott Pilgrim says: You know what sucks?

Wallace Wells says: What?

Scott Pilgrim says: EVERYTHING.

Scott Pilgrim says: (to Knives) Ciao, Knives!

Scott Pilgrim says: [to Knives] Ciao, Knives!

Scott Pilgrim says: I kind of feel like I'm on drugs when I'm with you. Not that I do drugs. Unless you do drugs. Then I do drugs all the time, every drug.

Evan says: These Eyes...

Ramona Flowers says: Dude, I'm changing

Scott Pilgrim says: Ah! [covers his eyes] Sorry. It's just cold.

Ramona Flowers says: Here. Does that help?

Scott Pilgrim says: Yeah, that's very warm. What is that? [Scott's hands are pulled away to reveal Ramona] Okay...

Scott Pilgrim says: You cocky cock! You'll pay for your crimes against humanity!

Nick Twisp/Francois says: "Trent, I don't want to hurt you. Now I'll only ask once that you and your adorable sweater step away from the door."

Nick Twisp/Francois says: Trent, I don't want to hurt you. Now I'll only ask once that you and your adorable sweater step away from the door.

Scott Pilgrim says: You once were a ve-gone, but now you will be gone!

Todd Ingram says: Ve-gone?

Nick Twisp/Francois says: Now half as bad as the nasty things I wanna do to you right now with my tongue. I'm gonna wrap your legs around my head and wear you like the crown that you are.

Scott Pilgrim says: Wait! We're fighting over Ramona?

Matthew Patel says: Didn't you get my E-mail explaining the situation?

Scott Pilgrim says: I skimmed it.

Party Teen says: Becca's been looking for you. She said something about blowing you.

Evan says: Isn't she drunk? Isn't that illegal if she's drunk?

Party Teen says: Not if you're drunk too.

Seth says: He (Fogell) doesn't even have a first name! It just says Mclovin!

Seth says: He [Fogell] doesn't even have a first name! It just says Mclovin!

Evan says: One name? One name? Who are you, Seal?

Scott Pilgrim says: Are you a pirate?

Matthew Patel says: ....Pirates are in this year!

Scott Pilgrim says: You know what sucks the most?

Wallace Wells says: What?

Scott Pilgrim says: Everything...

Matthew Patel says: This is impossible, how can this be?

Scott Pilgrim says: Open your eyes, maybe you'll see.

Seth says: I used to sit around all day, drawing pictures of dicks.

Evan says: A dick, like a man dick?

Scott Pilgrim says: Hey! You totally came!

Ramona Flowers says: Yes. I did totally come.

Scott Pilgrim says: This sucks. I'm gonna pee due to boredom.

Scott Pilgrim says: Hi, I was thinking about asking you out but then I realized how stupid that would be.

Scott Pilgrim says: So do you wanna go out sometime?

Seth says: I'll be like the iron chef of pounding vag!

Evan says: Can you just get out of here and we'll talk about this later?

Greg the Soccer Player says: What the fuck Evan! We're down two points!

Evan says: Fuckin calm down Greg it's soccer. It's soccer.

Greg the Soccer Player says: Fuck you man!

Seth says: Hey Greg, why don't you go piss your pants again?

Greg the Soccer Player says: That was like 8 years ago, asshole!

Seth says: People don't forget!

Scott Pilgrim says: "If I peed my pants, would you pretend I just got wet from the rain?"

Scott Pilgrim says: If I peed my pants, would you pretend I just got wet from the rain?

Kim Pine says: Where's Knives? Not comin' tonight?

Scott Pilgrim says: Naw, we broke up .. hey, check it out, I learned the bass line from Final Fantasy II [plays]

Kim Pine says: [into mike] Scott, you are the salt of the earth.

Scott Pilgrim says: Thanks!

Kim Pine says: [into mike] I meant scum of the earth.

Young Neil says: You broke up with Knives?

Scott Pilgrim says: Yeah, but don't worry, maybe soon you'll meet my "new-new" girlfriend.

Young Neil says: New .. new ..

Stephen Stills says: OK, from here on out, no girlfriends, nor girlfriend talk at practice, wether they're old, new, or 'new-new' .. we were lucky to survive the last round, it's sudden death now! OK!?

Scott Pilgrim says: OK! [starts playing] [doorbell rings] That's for me!

Scott Pilgrim says: You once were a veg-on but now you will be gone

Todd Ingram says: ve-gon? [Scott Headbutts Todd][Todd Explodes]

Todd Ingram says: Ve-gon? [Scott Headbutts Todd] [Todd Explodes]

Oh says: rub it in with my hand?

Oh says: Rub it in with my hand?

High Priest says: no your ball sack, yes your hand!

High Priest says: No your ball sack, yes your hand!

Scott Pilgrim says: Sweet, coins!

Wallace Wells says: [refers to Matthew Patel] Hey. What's with his outfit?

Some Guy says: Yeah, is he a pirate?

Scott Pilgrim says: [genuinely curious] Are you a pirate?

Matthew Patel says: Pirates are in this year!

Matthew Patel says: [crashing into the concert] Mister Pilgrim! It is I, Matthew Patel! Consider our fight begun! [lunges in slow motion at Scott]

Scott Pilgrim says: [dumb-founded] What did I do?! What do I do?

Wallace Wells says: Fight!

Todd Ingram says: [to Scott after sending him flying through some walls] I can read your thoughts. Your will is broken. You're through.

Scott Pilgrim says: [holds up two cups of coffee] Say we drink to my memory. Fair-trade blend with soy milk?

Envy Adams says: Oh, please. But that's pathetic.

Todd Ingram says: Dude. I saw into your mind's eye. You put half-and-half in one of those coffees in attempt to make me break vegan edge. I'll take the one with soy. [takes one of the coffees via telekenesis] Thanks, tool. [and he drinks from it]

Scott Pilgrim says: Actually, mucacho, I put the coffee in this cup. But I thought really hard to put it in that one, 'in my mind's eye' or whatever.

Todd Ingram says: [disbelief] What are you talking about?

Scott Pilgrim says: You just drank half-and-half, baby.

Lucas Lee says: Prepare the feel the wrath of the League of Evil Ex's!

Scott Pilgrim says: The what?

Lucas Lee says: You seriously don't know about the League? Seven evil ex's? Coming to kill you? Controlling the future of Ramona's love life?

Scott Pilgrim says: No...?

Lucas Lee says: Really? [offers his hand to Scott] Hey, man, don't worry about it.

Scott Pilgrim says: Really?

Lucas Lee says: Yeah! Let's go grab a beer.

Scott Pilgrim says: That's awesome!

Lucas Lee says: [punches Scott as he gets up, laughing with glee]

Todd Ingram says: Tell it to the cleaning lady on Monday.

Scott Pilgrim says: What?

Todd Ingram says: Because you will be dust by Monday.

Scott Pilgrim says: Um....

Todd Ingram says: Because you will pulverized in two seconds, and the cleaning lady, she cleans up....dust, *imitates a dusting movement with his hand*...she dusts.

Scott Pilgrim says: I'm in lesbians with you.

Scott Pilgrim says: Woooowwwwww, girl number!

Nick O'Leary says: If anyone is getting raped in that van, it'll be a guy.

Scott Pilgrim says: This is, this is, this is...

Wallace Wells says: What?!

Lucas Lee says: This is boring.

Paulie Bleeker says: I still have your underwear.

Juno MacGuff says: I still have your virginity.

Evan says: I mean, it's up to you Fogell. This guy's gonna think, "Oh, here's another kid with a fake I.D., or here's McLovin, the 25 year old Hawaiian organ donor." Okay, so what's it gonna be?

Evan says: I mean, it's up to you Fogell. This guy's gonna think, 'Oh, here's another kid with a fake I.D., or here's McLovin, the 25 year old Hawaiian organ donor.' Okay, so what's it gonna be?

Fogell says: I am McLovin'.

Seth says: No, you're not. No one's McLovin'. McLovin's never existed, because that's a made-up, dumb, fucking fairytale name, you fuck!

Knives Chau says: I've never kissed a guy,

Scott Pilgrim says: Hey, neither have I.

Scott Pilgrim says: You once were a ve-gone, but now you will be-gone.

Scott Pilgrim says: I am in lesbians with you.

Stephen Stills says: We shouldn't even be here. We shouldn't even BE HERE!!!

Scott Pilgrim says: Come on man!*slap* I put my promises aside for the music!*slap* If I can do that we can do anything.

Scott Pilgrim says: 2 gin and tonics please.

Scott Pilgrim says: Two Gin & Tonics, please.

Ramona Flowers says: I thought you didn't drink.

Scott Pilgrim says: Gideon's here? Where?

Kim Pine says: That geeky guy next to your girlfriend.

Scott Pilgrim says: That's Gideon!? Gideon is G-Man!?

Scott Pilgrim says: You are blowing up.....RIGHT NOW!

Scott Pilgrim says: You are blowing up... RIGHT NOW!

Scott Pilgrim says: I gotta pee on her

Scott Pilgrim says: I gotta pee on her.

Scott Pilgrim says: Bread makes you fat!?

Scott Pilgrim says: I'm in lesbians with you

Scott Pilgrim says: I'm in lesbians with you.

Paulie Bleeker says: Wizard.

Paulie Bleeker says: [exhales] Wizard.

Fogell says: You still haven't told him we're moving in together?

Evan says: Fogell shut the fuck up.

Knives Chau says: (after coin explosion) wooooooooooooow

Knives Chau says: [after coin explosion] Wow!

Scott Pilgrim says: yea.....woooooooooooooow

Scott Pilgrim says: Yea... Wow.

Scott Pilgrim says: I'm in lesbians with you.

Oh says: Im not following,I'v just been leading from the rear.

Oh says: Im not following, I'v just been leading from the rear.

Scott Pilgrim says: I love garlic bread. I could honestly eat it all the time nonstop.

Ramona Flowers says: Then you'd get fat.

Scott Pilgrim says: Why would I get fat?

Ramona Flowers says: Bread makes you fat.

Scott Pilgrim says: Bread makes you fat!?

Scott Pilgrim says: Your kidding. Anyone can be vegan.

Todd Ingram says: Ovo-lacto vegetarian maybe

Scott Pilgrim says: Ovo what?

Todd Ingram says: I partake not in the meat nor the breast milk nor the ovum of any creature with a face

Todd Ingram says: I partake not in the meat nor the breast milk nor the ovum of any creature with a face.

Envy Adams says: Short answer, being vegan just makes you better than most people

Envy Adams says: Short answer, being vegan just makes you better than most people.

Todd Ingram says: Bingo

Todd Ingram says: Bingo.

Scott Pilgrim says: You and Her?

Scott Pilgrim says: You know her?

Ramona Flowers says: It was a phase...

Ramona Flowers says: It was just a phase.

Scott Pilgrim says: You had a sexy phase?

Scott Pilgrim says: You had a sexy phase?

Roxy Richter says: Next time I'll be deadly serious next time!

Roxy Richter says: Because next time, I'll be deadly serious next time.

Scott Pilgrim says: What?

Gideon Graves says: Hey buddy!

Scott Pilgrim says: Save it. (Takes jacket off) You're pretentious. This club sucks. I got beef. Let's do it.

Scott Pilgrim says: Save it. [Takes jacket off] You're pretentious. This club sucks. I got beef. Let's do it.

Scott Pilgrim says: You know your hair?

Ramona Flowers says: I know of it.

Scott Pilgrim says: It's all blue.

Lollipop Hipster says: What's the password?

Scott Pilgrim says: Ughh, whatever!

Lollipop Hipster says: Cool.

Scott Pilgrim says: Before you hear some dirty lies from someone else, yes I'm dating a 17 year old.

Wallace Wells says: Awww, is he cute?

Scott Pilgrim says: Oh ha ha.

Wallace Wells says: Does this mean we have to stop sleeping together?

Scott Pilgrim says: You see another bed in here?

Wallace Wells says: Oh yeah, you're totally my bitch forever.

Scott Pilgrim says: Hey, so can this not be a one night stand? For one thing, I didn't even get any... that was a joke.

Ramona Flowers says: We all have baggage.

Scott Pilgrim says: Yeah, well my baggage doesn't try to kill me every five minutes.

Scott Pilgrim says: Did you know that the original name for Pac-Man was Puck-Man? You'd think it was because he looks like a hockey puck but it actually comes from the Japanese phrase 'Paku-Paku,' which means to flap one's mouth open and closed. They changed it because they thought Puck-Man would be too easy to vandalize, you know, like people could just scratch off the P and turn it into an F or whatever.

Scott Pilgrim says: You once were a ve-gone, but now... you will be gone.

Scott Pilgrim says: You once were a ve-gone, but now you will begone.

Todd Ingram says: "Ve-gone"...?

Todd Ingram says: Ve-gone?

Knives Chau says: You should come over to my house for dinner!

Scott Pilgrim says: Like, Chinese food?

Wallace Wells says: If you want something bad, you have to fight for it. Step up your game, Scott. Break out the L-word.

Scott Pilgrim says: Lesbian?

Wallace Wells says: The other L-word.

Scott Pilgrim says: ...lesbians?

Scott Pilgrim says: Lesbians?

Wallace Wells says: It's "love", Scott.

Wallace Wells says: It's 'love', Scott.

Scott Pilgrim says: When I'm around you, I kind of feel like I'm on drugs. Not that I do drugs. Unless you do drugs, in which case... I do them all the time.

Scott Pilgrim says: If I peed my pants would you pretend that I just got wet from the rain?

Ramona Flowers says: It's not raining.

Knives Chau says: I've never even kissed a guy before!

Scott Pilgrim says: Hey... me neither.

Scott Pilgrim says: What's the website for Amazon.ca?

Wallace Wells says: ...Amazon.ca.

Wallace Wells says: Amazon.ca.

Juno MacGuff says: You're one of the coolest people I've ever met and you don't even have to try.

Juno MacGuff says: 'Cause you're, like, the coolest person I've ever met, and you don't even have to try, you know.

Paulie Bleeker says: I try really hard, actually.

Scott Pilgrim says: Young Neil, you have learned well. From this point forward, you will be known as... NEEIILLL!!

Scott Pilgrim says: Young Neil, you have learned well. From this point forward, you will be known as... NEIL!

Kim Pine says: Scott, not that I care, you should go talk to her before she's gone.

Scott Pilgrim says: Thanks Kim.

Kim Pine says: And I really don't care!

Scott Pilgrim says: Not only do I wanna take part, I wanna take them apart!

Stephen Stills says: ...I want her to geek out on us.

Stephen Stills says: I want her to geek out on us.

Scott Pilgrim says: She'll geek. She geeks. She has the capacity to geek.

Scott Pilgrim says: What's the website for Amazon.ca?

Wallace Wells says: Amazon.ca

Scott Pilgrim says: If I peed my pants would you pretend that I just got wet from the rain?

Scott Pilgrim says: If I peed my pants would you pretend that I just got wet from the rain?

Ramona Flowers says: Its not raining

Ramona Flowers says: It's not raining.

Wallace Wells says: If you want something bad, you have to fight for it. Step up your game, Scott. Break out the L-word.

Wallace Wells says: If you want something bad, you have to fight for it. Step up your game, Scott. Break out the L-word.

Scott Pilgrim says: Lesbian?

Wallace Wells says: The other L-word.

Scott Pilgrim says: ...Lesbians?

Scott Pilgrim says: Lesbians?

Todd Ingram says: Tell it to the cleaning lady on Monday.

Scott Pilgrim says: What?

Todd Ingram says: Because you'll be dust by Monday... because you'll be pulverized in two seconds. The cleaning lady? She cleans up... dust. She dusts.

Scott Pilgrim says: So, what's on Monday?

Todd Ingram says: 'Cause... it's Friday now, she's the weekends off, so... Monday, right?"

Todd Ingram says: 'Cause... it's Friday now, she has the weekends off, so... Monday, right?

Ramona Flowers says: It was just a phase!

Scott Pilgrim says: You hade a sexy phase?

Ramona Flowers says: I was just a little bi-curious!

Roxy Richter says: Well honey, I'm a little bi-furious!

Ramona Flowers says: You're not dead, your just having some idiotic dream.

Scott Pilgrim says: Ohh, does that mean we can make out?

Ramona Flowers says: How'd you meet Knives?

Scott Pilgrim says: Uhh, (Dial appears on his head, it lands between "Who her", and "I've got to pee".) I've got to pee on her, uhh, I mean I've got to pee.

Scott Pilgrim says: Uhh, (Dial appears on his head, it lands between 'Who her', and 'I've got to pee'.) I've got to pee on her, uhh, I mean I've got to pee.

Stacey Pilgrim says: Dating a high schooler?! Scandalous!

Scott Pilgrim says: Am not! Who told you?

Stacey Pilgrim says: Wallace. Duh.

Scott Pilgrim says: That gossipy bitch.

Wallace Wells says: You know me.

Scott Pilgrim says: Wallace!

Scott Pilgrim says: Oh god, so alone.

Ramona Flowers says: Your not alone.

Scott Pilgrim says: What?

Ramona Flowers says: Your just having some idiotic dream.

Scott Pilgrim says: Does that mean we can make out?!

Wallace Wells says: Guess who's drunk!?

Scott Pilgrim says: I guess Wallace.

Wallace Wells says: You guess right.

Wallace Wells says: If you want something bad, you have to fight for it. Step up your game, Scott. Break out the L-word.

Scott Pilgrim says: Lesbian?

Wallace Wells says: The other L-word.

Lucas Lee says: ...Lesbians?

Lucas Lee says: Lesbians?

Scott Pilgrim says: Lesbians?

Todd Ingram says: Tell it to the cleaning lady on Monday.

Scott Pilgrim says: What?

Todd Ingram says: Because you'll be dust by Monday... because you'll be pulverized in two seconds. The cleaning lady? She cleans up... dust. She dusts.

Todd Ingram says: Because you'll be dust by Monday because you'll be pulverized in two seconds. The cleaning lady? She cleans up dust. She dusts.

Scott Pilgrim says: So, what's on Monday?

Todd Ingram says: Cause... it's Friday now, she's the weekends off, so... Monday, right?

Todd Ingram says: Cause it's Friday now, she's the weekends off, so Monday, right?

Scott Pilgrim says: Okay, let’s start with Launchpad McQuack.

Scott Pilgrim says: Okay, let's start with Launchpad McQuack.

Stephen Stills says: That’s not the actual title of the song.

Stephen Stills says: That's not the actual title of the song.

Paulie Bleeker says: My mom uses color safe bleach.

Juno MacGuff says: You could totally go out with Katrina De Voort.

Paulie Bleeker says: No, I don't like Katrina. She smells like soup. Have you ever smelled her? I mean, her whole house smells like soup.

Kim Pine says: Scott if your life had a face I would punch it.

Scott Pilgrim says: yeah... wait what?

Scott Pilgrim says: Yeah. Wait what?

Kim Pine says: I mean, are you really happy or are you really evil?

Scott Pilgrim says: Evil? You mean, do I have, like, ulterior motives? I'm offended, Kim.

Kim Pine says: Wounded even?

Scott Pilgrim says: Hurt, Kim.

Evan says: You changed your name to McLovin?

Seth says: It doesn’t have a first name, it just says McLovin!

Seth says: It doesn't have a first name, it just says McLovin!

Evan says: The guys either going think ‘here’s another guy with a fake ID’, or here’s McLovin, 25 year old Hawaiian organ donor.

Fogell says: I am McLovin.

Norah says: The world has fallen to pieces, it's our job to put it back together.

Nick O'Leary says: Or maybe we're the ones who need to be put together.