Sarah Silverman

Highest Rated: 100% Michael Bolton's Big, Sexy Valentine's Day Special (2017)

Lowest Rated: 9% Say It Isn't So (2001)

Birthday: Dec 1, 1970

Birthplace: Bedford, New Hampshire, USA

Born December 1st, 1970, former Saturday Night Live cast member Sarah Silverman made her film debut in the 1997 Who's the Caboose. She then had a supporting role as a friend of Mary in Peter Farrelly and Bobby Farrelly's 1998 comedy smash There's Something About Mary. Following a part in Chris O'Donnell's The Bachelor, which also starred Renee Zelwegger, Brooke Shields, and James Cromwell, Silverman secured a deal with Columbia Tri-Star to create a vehicle for herself based on her one-woman show, Susan Plays Cheese. She received further exposure on various TV talk shows, as well as in the pages of Esquire Magazine's "breasts" issue and a fashion layout in Mirabella. She appeared in the comedies Screwed and Heartbreakers, and had a memorable role as the driven girlfriend in Richard Linklater's School of Rock. 2005 was a stellar year for Silverman on the big screen. In addition to writing and starring in Sarah Silverman: Jesus Is Magic, she was widely considered to have one of the very best appearances in the documentary The Aristocrats. She followed that up the next year with a part in Todd Phillips' School for Scoundrels. From 2007 to 2009, Silverman played herself in The Sarah Silverman Program, and edgy sitcom that earned the comedienne a nomination for a Primetime Emmy Award. Despite a devoted fan following, Comedy Central cancelled the show after three seasons. In 2008, Silverman appeared semi-regularly on Jimmy Kimmel Live for a series of raunchy sketches involving Matt Damon, and made several appearances on the USA Network's television series Monk. After making a cameo as herself in The Muppets in 2011, Silverman went a different direction by taking on a dramatic role in Take This Waltz, a film following a married couple whose relationship begins to crumble when one half of the pair forms an emotional bond with a neighbor. She next logged a series of voice roles, including Vanellope, a glitchy video game character in Disney's Wreck-It Ralph (2012) and a recurring role on Bob's Burgers. In 2014, she appeared in A Million Ways to Die in the West and began a guest arc on Masters of Sex.

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Highest Rated Movies

Michael Bolton's Big, Sexy Valentine's Day Special
100%
The Last Laugh
98%
The Muppets
95%
The Bitter Buddha
94%

Filmography

MOVIES

		CREDIT
88%	Ralph Breaks the Internet	Vanellope von Schweetz	—	2018
86%	Battle of the Sexes	Gladys Heldman	$12.6M	2017
22%	The Book of Henry	Shiela	$4.3M	2017
98%	The Last Laugh	Actor	—	2017
88%	Dying Laughing	Actor	—	2017
83%	Punching Henry	Actor	—	2017
No Score Yet	Sarah Silverman: A Speck of Dust	Actor	—	2017
100%	Michael Bolton's Big, Sexy Valentine's Day Special	Actor	—	2017
78%	Popstar: Never Stop Never Stopping	Paula	—	2016
51%	I Smile Back	Laney Brooks	$50.6K	2015
36%	Gravy	Bethany	—	2015
55%	Ashby	June Wallis	$5.1K	2015
71%	I Am Chris Farley	Actor	—	2015
78%	Harmontown	Actor	—	2014
33%	A Million Ways to Die in the West	Ruth	$37.4M	2014
44%	The Unbelievers	Actor	—	2013
No Score Yet	Comedy Central Roast of James Franco	Actor	—	2013
94%	The Bitter Buddha	Actor	—	2013
No Score Yet	Sarah Silverman: We are Miracles	Actor	—	2013
87%	Wreck-it Ralph	Vanellope von Schweetz	$189.5M	2012
78%	Take This Waltz	Geraldine	$1.2M	2012
95%	The Muppets	Greeter	$88.7M	2011
25%	Peep World	Cheri	$11.4K	2011
25%	Certifiably Jonathan	Actor	$8.3K	2011
77%	Strange Powers: Stephin Merritt And The Magnetic Fields	Actor	$68.6K	2010
No Score Yet	I Am Comic	Actor	—	2010
23%	Saint John of Las Vegas	Jill	$72.7K	2010
68%	Funny People	Herself	$51.9M	2009
No Score Yet	A Bad Situationist	Actor	—	2009
No Score Yet	Comedy Central Roast of Bob Saget	Actor	—	2008
80%	Mr. Warmth: The Don Rickles Project	Actor	—	2008
No Score Yet	Comedy Central's Home Grown	Actor	—	2008
63%	Super High Me	Actor	—	2007
No Score Yet	Comedians of Comedy - Live at the Troubador	Actor	—	2007
No Score Yet	The Secret Policeman's Ball	Actor	—	2006
25%	School for Scoundrels	Becky	$17.8M	2006
No Score Yet	Comedy Central Roast of William Shatner	Actor	—	2006
73%	I Want Someone to Eat Cheese With	Beth	—	2006
44%	Fired!	Actor	—	2006
46%	Rent	Alexi Darling	$29.1M	2005
64%	Sarah Silverman: Jesus Is Magic	Herself Producer	$1.3M	2005
No Score Yet	Comedy Central Roast of Pamela Anderson	Actor	—	2005
75%	Hair High	Cherri	—	2004
No Score Yet	Now That's Funny	Actor	—	2004
No Score Yet	Funny Ladies	Actor	—	2004
91%	School of Rock	Patty Di Marco	$81.3M	2003
43%	Evolution	Denise	$37.6M	2001
9%	Say It Isn't So	Gina Farelli	$4.9M	2001
53%	Heartbreakers	Linda	—	2001
13%	Screwed	Hillary	—	2000
9%	The Bachelor	Carolyn	—	1999
83%	There's Something About Mary	Brenda	—	1998
76%	Bulworth	2nd American Politics Assistant	—	1998
No Score Yet	Who's the Caboose?	Susan Underman Producer	—	1997

TV

		CREDIT
No Score Yet	Finding Your Roots With Henry Louis Gates Jr. 2012	Appearing	2019
90%	Bob's Burgers 2011	Voice	2019 2018 2017 2016 2011
No Score Yet	The Jim Jefferies Show 2017	Guest	2018
93%	The Zen Diaries of Garry Shandling 2018		2018
93%	I Love You, America with Sarah Silverman 2017-2018	Host Executive Producer	2018 2017
No Score Yet	Jeff Ross Presents Roast Battle 2016	Judge	2018 2017 2016
No Score Yet	The Late Late Show With James Corden 2015-2018	Guest	2018 2016
No Score Yet	The Ellen DeGeneres Show 2003	Guest	2018 2015
No Score Yet	The Late Show With Stephen Colbert 2015	Guest	2018 2015
No Score Yet	Late Night With Seth Meyers 2014	Guest	2018 2016 2015 2014
No Score Yet	The View 1997	Guest	2018 2016 2014
No Score Yet	Real Time With Bill Maher 2003	Guest	2018 2017 2016 2014 2010 2009
95%	Crashing 2017	Sarah Silverman	2017
No Score Yet	Independent Lens 1999	Appearing	2017
No Score Yet	The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon 2014	Guest	2017
38%	Chelsea 2016-2017	Guest Appearing	2017 2016
No Score Yet	Watch What Happens Live With Andy Cohen 2009	Guest	2017 2016
No Score Yet	Conan 2010	Guest	2017 2015 2012 2011 2010
No Score Yet	Jimmy Kimmel Live 2003	Guest Appearing	2017 2014 2013 2011 2005
85%	The Simpsons 1989	Voice	2016 2014 2010
No Score Yet	Inside the Actors Studio 1994-2018	Guest	2015
No Score Yet	The Late Late Show With Craig Ferguson 2005-2014	Guest	2015
No Score Yet	@midnight With Chris Hardwick 2014-2017	Appearing	2015 2014
No Score Yet	Charlie Rose 2013-2017	Guest	2015 2014
75%	Maron 2013-2016	Herself	2014
No Score Yet	Saturday Night Live 1975	Host Performer	2014
No Score Yet	Late Show With David Letterman 1993-2015	Guest	2014 2013
No Score Yet	Comedy Bang! Bang! 2012-2016	Guest	2013
No Score Yet	Totally Biased with W. Kamau Bell 2012-2013	Guest	2013
No Score Yet	Comedians in Cars Getting Coffee 2012-2018	Appearing	2013 2012
75%	The League 2009-2015	Heather	2013 2011
No Score Yet	Late Night With Jimmy Fallon 2009-2014	Guest	2013 2010
No Score Yet	The Graham Norton Show 2007	Guest	2013 2007
No Score Yet	Brand X with Russell Brand 2012-2013	Guest	2012
No Score Yet	Inside Comedy 2012-2015	Guest	2012
94%	Louie 2010-2015	Sarah	2012
No Score Yet	The Burn With Jeff Ross 2012-2013	Appearing	2012
No Score Yet	The Conversation With Amanda de Cadenet 2012	Guest	2012
No Score Yet	Talking Dead 2011	Guest	2012 2011
No Score Yet	The Tonight Show With Jay Leno 1992-2014	Guest	2012 2002
79%	Bored to Death 2009-2011	Counselor	2011
No Score Yet	Children's Hospital 2010-2016	Britches	2011
96%	The Good Wife 2009-2016	Stephanie Engler	2011
No Score Yet	The Marriage Ref 2010-2011	Panelist	2010
77%	The Sarah Silverman Program 2007-2010	Sarah Executive Producer Producer	2010 2008 2007
No Score Yet	American Idol 2002-2016	Appearing	2008
90%	Monk 2002-2009	Marci Maven	2008 2007 2004
66%	Entourage 2004-2011	Guest Herself	2004
94%	Frasier 1993-2004	Jane	2003
100%	The Larry Sanders Show 1992-1998	Wendy Traston	1998 1997 1996 1993
88%	Seinfeld 1989-1998	Emily	1997
77%	Star Trek: Voyager 1995-2001	Rain	1996

QUOTES FROM Sarah Silverman CHARACTERS

Laney

I'd love to smile like that again.

Laney

Nobody tells you it's terrifying to love something so much.

Laney

How much do you love me? Oh good. Oh good, oh good, oh good. Promise you don't leave me.

Wreck-It Ralph	I'm not from the candy tree department.
Vanellope von Schweetz	Lying to a child shame on you Ralph!

Vanellope von Schweetz

What's was that? I can't hear you. Your breath is so bad it made my ears numb.

Vanellope von Schweetz	I'm not a glitch Taffyta, I just have pixlexia.
Taffyta Muttonfudge	I'm trying! The tears won't stop!

Vanellope von Schweetz	I bundle myself up, like a little homeless lady
Vanellope von Schweetz	I bundle myself up, like a little homeless lady.

Wreck-It Ralph	I know, I know. I'm an idiot.
Vanellope von Schweetz	And?
Wreck-It Ralph	And a real numbskull.
Wreck-It Ralph	A selfish Diaper baby.
Wreck-It Ralph	A stinkbrain?
Vanellope von Schweetz	The stinkiest brain ever.

Vanellope von Schweetz

Enjoying your little tantrum, diaper baby?

Vanellope von Schweetz	Whoever was mean to me will be... executed!
Sergeant Calhoun	This place is starting to get interesting.

Vanellope von Schweetz	Hey, why are your hands so freakishly big?
Wreck-It Ralph	I don't know. Why are you so freakishly annoying?

Vanellope von Schweetz

Err, hello. Is Ralph in there? I'd like to speak to him please.

Vanellope von Schweetz

Don't worry. I've got it under control.

Vanellope von Schweetz	Stop crying, Taffyta.
Taffyta Muttonfudge	I'm trying, but it won't stop.

Vanellope von Schweetz	You could just live up in the castle, you'd have a home where you'll be respected. You could be happy.
Wreck-It Ralph	I'm already happy, I got the coolest job in the world! It may not be as fancy as being president, but I have a duty, a big duty!

Vanellope von Schweetz	Sweet mother of monkey milk, I found a gold coin!
Wreck-It Ralph	No, don't even think about it! Thats mine!

Vanellope von Schweetz	(Cries)You really are a bad guy!
Vanellope von Schweetz	You really are a bad guy!

Vanellope von Schweetz	Of everyone who was ever mean to me, shall be...executed.
Vanellope von Schweetz	Of everyone who was ever mean to me, shall be executed.
Taffyta Muttonfudge	What? No!
Fix-It Felix Jr.	Oh Lord...
Fix-It Felix Jr.	Oh Lord.
Sergeant Calhoun	This game just got interesting...
Sergeant Calhoun	This game just got interesting.

Wreck-It Ralph	Oh, I'll just magically win the race...just because I really want to!
Wreck-It Ralph	Oh, I'll just magically win the race just because I really want to!
Vanellope von Schweetz	I am a racer! I can feel it in my code!

Wreck-It Ralph	[to Vanellope] See ya later, 'President Fart-feathers'.
Vanellope von Schweetz	[to Ralph] Au revior, 'Admiral Underpants'.
Vanellope von Schweetz	[to Ralph] Au revoir, 'Admiral Underpants'.
Wreck-It Ralph	And farewell, 'Verminous Booger-face!'
Vanellope von Schweetz	Goodbye, 'Major Body Odor!'
Wreck-It Ralph	Hasta la vista ya-
Fix-It Felix Jr.	Ralph?!
Wreck-It Ralph	Alright, to be continued!

Vanellope von Schweetz	I bet you really gonna watch where you step in a game called Hero's duty[Vanellope Laughs] What's you win a medal for wiping? I hope you washed your hands after you handled that medal.
Wreck-It Ralph	Listen, I'm gonna!
Vanellope von Schweetz	Hang on, hang on, why did the hero flushed the toilet?... say why.
Wreck-It Ralph	why.
Vanellope von Schweetz	Because it was his duty!
Wreck-It Ralph	How dare you insult Hero's Duty you little gar snipe! I earned that medal! you better give it back to me two tweet sister!
Wreck-It Ralph	How dare you insult Hero's Duty you little gutter snipe! I earned that medal! you better give it back to me toot sweet! gutter snipe' and "toot sweet"
Wreck-It Ralph	How dare you insult Hero's Duty you little gutter snipe! I earned that medal! You better give it back to me toot sweet!

Vanellope von Schweetz	What are you looking at?
Wreck-It Ralph	You're welcome, rotten little thief.
Vanellope von Schweetz	I'm not a thief!, I just burrowed your stupid coin, i was gonna give it back to you as soon as I win the race.
Wreck-It Ralph	It's not a coin, it is a medal.
Vanellope von Schweetz	Coin medal whatever just go back to your own dumb game ad win another one.
Wreck-It Ralph	I can't, I didn't win it in my game, I won it in Hero's Duty.
Vanellope von Schweetz	Hero's Duty? [Vanellope Chuckles]

Vanellope von Schweetz	Ralph's my man..my main man.
Vanellope von Schweetz	Ralph's my man... my main man.

Vanellope von Schweetz

You're not from here are you?

Vanellope von Schweetz	I just want to race like you guys.
Taffyta Muttonfudge	You will never be a racer, because you're a glitch! And that's all you'll ever be!

Vanellope von Schweetz	You know you can just stay here and live in the castle. You'd have your own wing where no one would ever complain about your stench and treat you bad ever again. You could be happy.
Wreck-It Ralph	I'm already happy. I got the coolest friend in the world. And besides, I got a job to do, it may not be as fancy as being president; but it's my duty. And it's a big duty!

Wreck-It Ralph	Your a winner!
Vanellope von Schweetz	I'm a winner!
Wreck-It Ralph	And your adorable!
Vanellope von Schweetz	I'm adorable!

Vanellope von Schweetz

Ralph my man, my main man!

Vanellope von Schweetz

I bet you really gotta watch where you step in a game called Hero's Duty!

Vanellope von Schweetz	Welcome to my home! I sleep in these candy wrappers and bundle myself up like a little old lady!
Wreck-It Ralph	By yourself... All this garbage around you...?
Vanellope von Schweetz	Well... yeah. I mean, everyone here says I'm just a mistake and that I wasn't even supposed to exist. What do you expect?
Wreck-It Ralph	Listen, kid... I know it's none of my business, but why do you even stick around this game?
Vanellope von Schweetz	You really don't know anything, do you? Glitches can't leave their games... One of the joys of being me...

Wreck-It Ralph	[Disheartened moan] That's it! I'm never getting my medal back!
Vanellope von Schweetz	What is the big whoop about that crummy medal, anyway?
Wreck-It Ralph	The big whoop?! Well this may come as a shock to you, but in my game, I'm the Bad Guy, and I live in the garbage!
Vanellope von Schweetz	Cool!
Wreck-It Ralph	No! NOT cool! Unhygienic, and lonely, and boring... And that "crummy medal" was gonna change all that. I go home with that baby around my neck and I'll get a penthouse, pies, ice sculptures, fireworks!
Vanellope von Schweetz	[Looks at Ralph with a sympathetic expression]
Wreck-It Ralph	[Sighs] Grown-up stuff. You wouldn't understand...
Vanellope von Schweetz	No, I get it! That's exactly what racing would do for me!

Vanellope von Schweetz	Who are you!?
King Candy	[When his true form is revealed] I'm Turbo, the greatest racer ever! And I did not reprogram this world to let you and that halitosis-riddled warthog take it away from me!
King Candy	[when his true form is revealed] I'm Turbo, the greatest racer ever! And I did not reprogram this world to let you and that halitosis-riddled warthog take it away from me!

Wreck-It Ralph	Listen, I try to be nice--
Vanellope von Schweetz	[Imitating Ralph] I try to be nice.
Wreck-It Ralph	...You're mimicking me.
Vanellope von Schweetz	[Imitating Ralph] You're mimicking me.
Wreck-It Ralph	OK. That is rude and this conversation is over.
Vanellope von Schweetz	[Imitating Ralph] And this conversation is over. Uh, I wouldn't grab that branch if I were you...
Wreck-It Ralph	I'm from the Candy Tree Department, I know what--
Vanellope von Schweetz	It's a double-stripe. [The branch disintegrates, Ralph falls and grabs another branch below] Double-stripes break. Gah-doi... Hey, why are your hands so freakishly big?
Wreck-It Ralph	Uh, I don't know, why are you so freakishly annoying?

Wreck-It Ralph	Wow. So, this is the real you: a princess.
Vanellope von Schweetz	Ah, Ralph, what, are you nuts? Come on, this isn't me. [Glitches out of her gown and into her normal clothes] THIS is me!
Wreck-It Ralph	Huh?
Vanellope von Schweetz	Look, the code may say I'm a princess, but I know who I really am, Ralph: I'm a racer with the greatest superpower ever! [While glitching to random places] I was here! I was there! I was glitching through the walls! I'm not giving that up!

Vanellope von Schweetz	As your wonderful princess I hereby decree that everyone who was ever mean to me shall be... executed.
Taffyta Muttonfudge	[And the other racers] WHAT!?! No, no, no, please, please!
Fix-It Felix	[Along with Ralph staring in shock] Oh, my lands!
Sergeant Calhoun	Oh, this place just got interesting.

Wreck-It Ralph	[Smashes Vanellope's cell door down and walks in with her repaired kart] ...I know, I know, I know, I'm an idiot...
Vanellope von Schweetz	...And?
Wreck-It Ralph	And a real numbskull...
Vanellope von Schweetz	[starts smiling] And?
Wreck-It Ralph	A selfish diaper baby.
Vanellope von Schweetz	And?
Wreck-It Ralph	...A stinkbrain?
Vanellope von Schweetz	[Fully smiling] The stinkiest brain ever.

King Candy	[Laughs, holds Ralph above Diet Cola Mountain] It's game over for both of you!
Wreck-It Ralph	No... Just for me! [Breaks free of Candy's grip and free falls]
Vanellope von Schweetz	Ralph!
Fix-It Felix	Vanellope! [Tries to stop her, but she starts glitching her way toward Ralph]
Wreck-It Ralph	[Falling, fist outstretched] I'm bad, and that's good! I will never be good and that's not bad! [looks at Vanellope's medal] There's no one I'd rather be... than me.

Vanellope von Schweetz	I'm gonna learn to drive! I'm gonna learn to drive! I'm gonna--oh, wait--do you know how to drive?
Wreck-It Ralph	Yeah... I mean I haven't done it, but--look, I flew a spaceship today, OK?
Vanellope von Schweetz	You crashed it.

Vanellope von Schweetz	Whoa. What? You have teeth? I don't think I've ever seen you smile.
Wreck-It Ralph	I'm not smiling, I'm just... I'm gassy, OK?
Vanellope von Schweetz	[Laughs]

Vanellope von Schweetz	Look, you want that medal, right? And I want to race. So, here's what I'm thinking... You help me get a new kart--a REAL kart--and I'll win the race and get you back your medal.
Wreck-It Ralph	You want ME to help YOU?!
Vanellope von Schweetz	All you gotta do is break something for me. C'mon what do you say, [extends arm] friend?
Wreck-It Ralph	We are not friends.
Vanellope von Schweetz	Aw, c'mon pal, you son-of-a-gun. C'mon buddy. Let's shake on it.
Wreck-It Ralph	[Turns away in disgust]
Vanellope von Schweetz	Ah, come on chumbo. Ralph my man. My main man. Hey... My arm's getting tired. We have a deal or not?
Wreck-It Ralph	[Grunts in exasperation, turns to Vanellope] You better win!

Vanellope von Schweetz	Well, unless you've got a go-kart hidden in the fat folds of your neck, I can't help you.
Wreck-It Ralph	[Stops himself from crushing Vanellope's head, smashes trees, and continually beats on a jawbreaker in an attempt to break it]
Vanellope von Schweetz	What a moron... [To Ralph] Hey genius! That's a jawbreaker! You're never gonna--
Wreck-It Ralph	[Finally splits the jawbreaker in half and sits down]
Vanellope von Schweetz	You enjoy your little tantrum, diaper baby?

Vanellope von Schweetz

What's that? Didn't hear ya. Your breath was so bad it made my ears numb!

Vanellope von Schweetz	Vanellope: Why are your hands so freakishly big?
Vanellope von Schweetz	Why are your hands so freakishly big?

Vanellope von Schweetz	I guess you really gotta watch where you step in a game called "Hero's Doodie"!
Vanellope von Schweetz	I guess you really gotta watch where you step in a game called 'Hero's Doodie'!

Vanellope von Schweetz	Everyone here says I'm a mistake.
Vanellope von Schweetz	Everyone here says I'm just a mistake..

Vanellope von Schweetz	Sweet Mother of Monkey Milk!
Vanellope von Schweetz	Sweet mother of monkey milk, a gold coin!

Vanellope von Schweetz	Hey, why are your hands so freakishly big?
Vanellope von Schweetz	Why are your hands so freakishly big?
Wreck-It Ralph	I dunno, why are YOU so freakishly annoying?!
Wreck-It Ralph	I don't know. Why are you so freakishly annoying?

Vanellope von Schweetz	Are you a hobo?
Wreck-It Ralph	No, I am not a hobo. But I am busy, okay, so you go... go home.
Vanellope von Schweetz	What's that? Didn't hear ya. Your breath is so bad it mad my ears numb!

Vanellope von Schweetz	What's that?
Wreck-It Ralph	A medal! I earned it in Heroes Duty!
Vanellope von Schweetz	[chuckles]
Wreck-It Ralph	Not that kind of duty!

Wreck-It Ralph	Listen, I tried to be nice...
Vanellope von Schweetz	(imitating Ralph) I tried to be nice.
Vanellope von Schweetz	[imitating Ralph] I tried to be nice.
Wreck-It Ralph	You're mimicking me...
Vanellope von Schweetz	(imitating Ralph) You're mimicking me.
Vanellope von Schweetz	[imitating Ralph] You're mimicking me.
Wreck-It Ralph	That is rude, and this conversation is officially over.