Seth Rogen

Seth Rogen

Highest Rated: 93% 50/50 (2011)

Lowest Rated: 17% The Watch (2012)

Birthday: Apr 15, 1982

Birthplace: Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada

Canadian-born actor Seth Rogen tapped into his skills as a comedian when he was only 13, signing up for comedy classes and honing his deadpan style. He tooled around as an amateur for a few years but eventually took his act down south, hoping to find success as an actor and standup comedian in the U.S. He was soon discovered by Judd Apatow and was cast in his short-lived series Freaks and Geeks. After its cancellation, Apatow cast Rogen in his next series, Undeclared -- for which Rogen significantly contributed as a writer. Undeclared met the same fate as Freaks and Geeks and was canceled mid-season, but both series became surprisingly hot cult hits upon their DVD releases. Rogen went on to write for Da Ali G Show and take minor roles in Donnie Darko and Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy before being tapped by Apatow once again for a new project, this time on the big screen. The film was 2005's The 40-Year-Old Virgin, and Rogen's role as Steve Carell's well-meaning friend Cal finally brought him the large-scale success that made his comic skills a valuable commodity. Rogen also acted as co-producer on the film, which was touted as the funniest movie in years by critics and audiences alike, eventually grossing well over a hundred million dollars. There was obviously good chemistry on the set of The 40 Year Old Virgin, so Rogen signed on to appear in Apatow's 2007 comedy Knocked Up. Appearing alongside his old cast mates Paul Rudd and Leslie Mann, Rogen starred as a man who is forced to deal with serious unforeseen consequences when his one-night stand becomes pregnant. After the filmmakers' initial plans to cast Anne Hathaway in the opposite role fell through, Grey's Anatomy star Katherine Heigl signed on to star as the female lead. The smash success of Superbad made him one of the biggest comedy stars of his generation and led to Pineapple Express, a pot comedy opposite James Franco. He was Zack in Zack and MIri Make a Porno, and took a screenwriting credit on Drillbit Taylor in 2008. He lent his distinctive gravelly voice to a number of animated films including Kung Fu Panda and Monsters vs. Aliens. In 2009 he stretched himself, reteaming with Apatow for Funny People, and taking the lead in the black comedy Observe and Report. In 2011 he was The Green Hornet, but he also appeared as the best friend to a young cancer victim in the comedy 50/50. He also played the husband of Michelle Williams in Sarah Polley's Take This Waltz.

Photos

Highest Rated Movies

Filmography

Movies

Credit
No Score Yet An American Pickle Herschel Greenbaum Producer 2020
23% Zeroville Actor 2019
79% Good Boys Producer 2019
53% The Lion King Pumbaa 2019
81% Long Shot Fred Flarsky 2019
No Score Yet B.O.O.: Bureau of Otherworldly Operations Jackson Moss 2019
No Score Yet Casi imposible Fred Flarsky Producer 2019
83% Blockers Producer 2018
46% Like Father Actor 2018
No Score Yet Seth Rogen's Hilarity for Charity Actor 2018
20% Game Over, Man! Producer 2018
91% The Disaster Artist Producer Sandy Schklair 2017
No Score Yet F For Franco Actor 2017
No Score Yet Console Wars Director Screenwriter 2017
No Score Yet The Something Producer Actor 2017
83% Sausage Party Frank Producer Screenwriter $97.7M 2016
63% Neighbors 2: Sorority Rising Producer Screenwriter Mac Radner 2016
87% Kung Fu Panda 3 Mantis $128.4M 2016
68% The Night Before Isaac Producer $31.4M 2015
86% Steve Jobs Steven Wozniak $12.5M 2015
33% Being Canadian Actor 2015
52% The Interview Producer Director Screenwriter Aaron Rapaport $4.6M 2014
22% The Sound And The Fury Telegraph 2014
73% Neighbors Producer Mac Radner $134.5M 2014
No Score Yet Comedy Central Roast of James Franco Actor 2013
83% This Is the End Screenwriter Seth Rogen Director Producer $96.3M 2013
37% The Guilt Trip Executive Producer Andrew Brewster $37.2M 2012
57% For a Good Time, Call... Jerry $1.3M 2012
17% The Watch Screenwriter $34.2M 2012
79% Take This Waltz Lou $1.2M 2012
No Score Yet Kung Fu Panda: Secrets of the Masters Mantis 2011
93% 50/50 Producer Kyle $35.1M 2011
81% Kung Fu Panda 2 Mantis $165.3M 2011
70% Paul Paul $37.4M 2011
44% The Green Hornet Screenwriter Executive Producer Britt Reid/The Green Hornet $98.1M 2011
No Score Yet Fight For Your Right Revisited Mike D (B-Boys 1) 2011
No Score Yet Night of the Living Carrots Actor 2011
No Score Yet With Great Power: The Stan Lee Story Actor 2010
No Score Yet Monsters Vs. Aliens: Mutant Pumpkins From Outer Space Actor 2009
60% Paper Heart Himself $1.2M 2009
69% Funny People Ira Wright Executive Producer $51.9M 2009
51% Observe and Report Ronnie Barnhardt $24M 2009
73% Monsters vs. Aliens B.O.B. $198.4M 2009
No Score Yet Popcorn Porn Actor 2009
No Score Yet B.O.B.'S Big Break B.O.B. 2009
No Score Yet Kung Fu Panda: Secrets Of The Scroll Mantis 2008
65% Zack and Miri Make a Porno Zack $31.4M 2008
68% Pineapple Express Dale Denton Screenwriter Executive Producer $87.4M 2008
32% Fanboys Actor $0.8M 2008
55% Step Brothers Sporting Goods Manager $100.5M 2008
87% Kung Fu Panda Mantis $215.4M 2008
79% Dr. Seuss' Horton Hears a Who! Morton $154.4M 2008
80% The Spiderwick Chronicles Hogsqueal $71.2M 2008
88% Superbad Executive Producer Screenwriter Officer Michaels $121.5M 2007
90% Knocked Up Ben Stone Executive Producer $148.8M 2007
41% Shrek the Third Ship Captain $320.8M 2007
20% You, Me and Dupree Neil $75.7M 2006
85% The 40 Year Old Virgin Cal Producer $109.3M 2005
66% Anchorman - The Legend Of Ron Burgundy Eager Cameraman $84.2M 2004
87% Donnie Darko Ricky Danforth 2001

TV

Credit
56% Black Monday
2019
Executive Producer 2020
2019
80% Breakfast, Lunch & Dinner
2019
Guest 2019
No Score Yet Comedians in Cars Getting Coffee
2012-2019
Guest 2019
100% Desus & Mero
2019
Guest 2019
84% The Boys
2019
Director 2019
100% The Chef Show
2019
Guest 2019
No Score Yet The Shop
2018
Appearing 2019
73% The Twilight Zone
2019
2019
91% Future Man
2017-2019
Director Executive Producer 2019
2017
No Score Yet The Late Late Show With James Corden
2015-2019
Guest 2019
2017
87% Preacher
2016-2019
Director Executive Producer Producer 2019
2018
2017
2016
No Score Yet The Late Show With Stephen Colbert
2015
Guest 2019
2018
2017
2016
No Score Yet Late Night With Seth Meyers
2014
Guest 2019
2018
2017
2015
No Score Yet The Graham Norton Show
2007
Guest 2019
2016
2014
No Score Yet Jimmy Kimmel Live
2003
Guest 2019
2018
2015
2014
2012
No Score Yet Close Up With the Hollywood Reporter
2015
Guest 2018
No Score Yet Talking With Chris Hardwick
2017-2018
Guest 2018
83% The Joel McHale Show With Joel McHale
2018
Appearing 2018
No Score Yet Snoop Dogg Presents the Joker's Wild
2017
Guest 2018
2017
No Score Yet The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon
2014
Guest 2018
2016
2015
2014
No Score Yet The Ellen DeGeneres Show
2003
Guest 2018
2015
2012
2011
No Score Yet Desus & Mero (2016)
2016-2018
Guest 2017
2016
56% Any Given Wednesday With Bill Simmons
2016
Guest 2016
No Score Yet Billy on the Street
2011-2017
Appearing 2016
No Score Yet Jeff Ross Presents Roast Battle
2016-2018
Judge 2016
No Score Yet Martha & Snoop's Potluck Dinner Party
2016
Guest 2016
No Score Yet Variety Studio: Actors on Actors
2015
Guest 2016
2015
No Score Yet Watch What Happens Live With Andy Cohen
2009-2019
Guest 2016
2014
No Score Yet @midnight With Chris Hardwick
2014-2017
Panelist 2015
98% Last Week Tonight With John Oliver
2014
Appearing 2015
No Score Yet Colbert Report
2005-2014
Guest 2014
No Score Yet Real Time with Bill Maher
2003
Guest 2014
No Score Yet Sunday Morning
2011-2018
Appearing 2014
69% The Comeback
2005-2014
Himself 2014
No Score Yet The Eric Andre Show
2012-2016
Guest 2014
81% The League
2009-2015
Screenwriter Randy Dirty Randy 2014
2013
2012
2011
No Score Yet Conan
2010
Guest 2014
2013
2011
2010
85% The Simpsons
1989
Voice Screenwriter 2014
2009
No Score Yet Saturday Night Live
1975
Host Appearing Performer 2014
2011
2009
2007
86% The Mindy Project
2012-2017
Sam 2013
No Score Yet The Nerdist
2011-2013
Guest 2013
No Score Yet Late Night With Jimmy Fallon
2009-2014
Guest 2013
2010
No Score Yet The Daily Show With Jon Stewart
1999-2015
Guest 2013
2011
2009
No Score Yet Comedy Bang! Bang!
2012-2016
Guest 2012
No Score Yet Dr. Phil
2002
Guest 2012
No Score Yet Late Show With David Letterman
1993-2015
Guest 2012
2011
No Score Yet Lopez Tonight
2009-2011
Guest 2011
No Score Yet The Tonight Show With Jay Leno
1992-2014
Guest 2011
No Score Yet MythBusters
2003
Guest 2010
71% Family Guy
1999
Voice 2009
No Score Yet American Dad (target for inaccurate feed data)
2005
Voice 2008
2007
2005
93% Undeclared
2001-2002
Ron Ron Garner 2003
2002
2001
100% Freaks and Geeks
1999-2000
Ken 2000
1999
No Score Yet The Mindy Project
Sam

QUOTES FROM Seth Rogen CHARACTERS

Dave Skylark says: Haters gonna hate ... and ain'ters gonna ain't.

Aaron Rapaport says: That is not an actual thing that people say.

Steven Wozniak says: It's not binary. You can be a genius AND be a decent man.

Steven Wozniak says: It's not binary. You can be a genius and be a decent man.

Fogell says: What's it like having guns?

Officer Michaels says: It is awesome, Mclovin, it's mind-boggling. I haven't had for long, only a few months, but it's like having two cocks. If one of your cocks could kill a man.

Mac Radner says: Never funny

Mac Radner says: I thought it was stupid. Very few funny parts. Young teens will love it

Mac Radner says: Delta Si Has The Upper Hand!

Carl Peterson says: Why don't you watch it in your house.

Neil says: Because I can't have friends over on weeknights and you know that.

Michael Cera says: Everybody listen up! Who took my fucking cell phone man? Martin, empty your pockets!

Martin Starr says: What?

Michael Cera says: I saw you in the bathroom, man! Somebody dial my phone! Unbelievable! Unacceptable, after coke I wasted on you people, thrown away!

Seth Rogen says: *Street light starts falling* Whoa, whoa!

Seth Rogen says: Whoa, whoa!

Michael Cera says: *Street light impales Micheal and lifts him up* *He pulls out his ringing phone* Shit, that's embarrassing

Michael Cera says: Shit, that's embarrassing

Seth Rogen says: I'm a victim. I've had a victim's mentality my whole life. People could smell it on me. When I was a kid, I had man titties, the bullies held me down, they titty fucked me.

James Franco says: That's what's happening out there!

Seth Rogen says: You think this is Skynet? Synet went live?

Jay Baruchel says: The power of Christ compels you!

Jonah Hill says: Does it Jay?

Jonah Hill says: Does it jay?

Jay Baruchel says: THE POWER OF CHRIST COMPELLS YOU!

Jonah Hill says: Does it Jay? Do I look compelled Jay? Let me tell you, its not very compelling!

Seth Rogen says: What are you just quoting the Exorcist

Jay Baruchel says: Yes dude it was a fucking training manual! I'm pretty sure they did their fucking research!

Jay Baruchel says: Yes dude, it was a fucking training manual! I'm pretty sure they did their fucking research!

Graeme Willy says: How can I understand you; are you using some sort of neuro-language router?

Paul says: Or, maybe I'm speaking ENGLISH, you fucking idiot!

Paul says: Or, maybe I'm speaking English, you fucking idiot!

Danny McBride says: We should just stay in here, fortify this bitch, and take it into all the food and shit we have.

Seth Rogen says: We got: twelve bottles of water, fifty-six beers, half-ounce sour diesel, one ounce of shrooms, Nutella, CT Crunch...a Milky Way?

Seth Rogen says: We got: twelve bottles of water, fifty-six beers, half-ounce sour diesel, one ounce of shrooms, Nutella, CT Crunch. A Milky Way?

Jonah Hill says: Can I have that Milky Way?

James Franco says: No, you can't have the Milky Way. It's my special food, I like it.

Seth Rogen says: I want some of the Milky Way.

Craig Robinson says: I'd be pretty bummed if I don't at least get a bite of the Milky Way.

Jay Baruchel says: Can we please go to fucking Carl's Jr.?

Seth Rogen says: Uh...I'm on a cleanse.

Seth Rogen says: Uh. I'm on a cleanse.

Jay Baruchel says: So, you're not drinking, you're not smoking weed...

Jay Baruchel says: So, you're not drinking, you're not smoking weed?

Seth Rogen says: I'm on a cleanse, I'm not psychotic.

Ben Stone says: [watching Cheaper by the Dozen after taking mushrooms] This isn't funny. This guy's got twelve kids, that's not funny. That's a lot of responsibility to just be... laughing about. This is sick. This is a sick movie. I gotta turn this off. It's freaking me out.

Ben Stone says: You know how they say to never drink and drive? Well, never drink and bone.

Ben Stone says: You think I'm an inventor? "He created a dick-skin condom, He hollowed out a penis and put it on", what the fuck?

Ben Stone says: Your face looks like Robin Williams' knuckles.

Ben Stone says: Do you want to do it doggie style?

Alison Scott says: You're not going to fuck me like a dog.

Ben Stone says: It's doggie style. It's just the style. We don't have to go outside or anything.

Jason says: I had the chicken pox THREE times. I have no immunity to it.

Ben Stone says: We don't have the heart to tell him it's herpes.

Jason says: It's not herpes if it's everywhere.

Alison Scott says: Why don't you go FUCK your FUCKING Bong?

Ben Stone says: I will! I'll do it doggy style, too! For once!

Ben Stone says: That's because Steely Dan Gargles my balls.

Ben Stone says: That's because Steely Dan gargles my balls.

Ben's Dad says: I love you. You're the best thing that ever happened to me.

Ben Stone says: I'm the best thing that's ever happened to you?

Ben's Dad says: Yes.

Ben Stone says: Now I'm starting to feel a little sorry for YOU...

Alison Scott says: I was drunk!

Ben Stone says: Was your vagina drunk?

Ben Stone says: [to Alison] I'm sorry I'm sweating on you...

Joyce Brewster says: If all the kids in the world were lined up and I was to pick one kid for myself Andy, it will always be you.

Andy Brewster says: I wouldn't let you pick anyone else mom.

Joyce Brewster says: Who the hell are you?

Andy Brewster says: Mom, you're in the wrong car!

Ricky Danforth says: 'Didn't your dad like...stab your mom?'

Ricky Danforth says: Didn't your dad like... stab your mom?

Joyce Brewster says: You want to drive to drive cross country with me?

Andy Brewster says: Yeah! No!

Dale Denton says: Coucous, the food's so nice, they named it twice

Dale Denton says: Coucous, the food's so nice, they named it twice.

Paul says: You'll know it when you see it.

Zack Brown says: Ziggy? Is that even in fucking papers anymore? No, man.

Delaney says: Fuck you, Ziggy's a comic. It's right next to Family Circus.

Zack Brown says: No, I mean.. Spider-Man and shit.

Kyle says: Have you got a picture?

Adam says: Why would I be carrying a picture of it?

Kyle says: You smell like you fucked the cast of The View.

Ricky Danforth says: Didn't your Dad, like, stab your mom?

Ricky Danforth says: Yeah, but didn't your dad like stab your mom?

Kyle says: she doesn't ? No fucking shit she doesn't like to. No one likes putting a dick in their mouth. You do it cause .. that's why they are called blowjobs .. it's a job

Kyle says: She does...No fucking shit she doesn't like to! Who likes putting dicks in their mouth? You do it cause that's why they call it blow jobs! It's a job!

Captain says: Hello... Kitty and Catty...

Officer Michaels says: I assume you all have guns and crack

Officer Michaels says: I assume you all have guns and crack.

Paul says: Clive likes boning space bears!

Katie says: B.O.B.: Wait, is it the whole 'there isn't a jar in the world I can't open' thing again? Did you find a jar you couldn't open? Did it have pickles in it? Where is the giant jar of pickles!?

B.O.B. says: Wait, is it the whole 'there isn't a jar in the world I can't open' thing again? Did you find a jar you couldn't open? Did it have pickles in it? Where is the giant jar of pickles!?

Graeme Willy says: Are you an alien?

Paul says: To you I am, yes.

Graeme Willy says: Are you gonna probe us

Paul says: Why does everyone always assume that, what am I doing? Am a harvesting farts?

Kyle says: I did it! I fucking nailed you! I've hated you for months and now I have fucking evidence that you suck as a person

Kyle says: I did it! I fucking nailed you! I've hated you for months and now I have fucking evidence that you suck as a person.

Kyle says: And I would like to present to you what I have grown to call exhibit whore!

Paul says: yo fuck nuts,its probing time

Paul says: Yo fuck nuts, its probing time.

Saul Silver says: hey look its like my thumb is my cock

Saul Silver says: Hey look, it's like my thumb is my cock. Heh heh...

Dale Denton says: thats not gonna get us a ride man

Dale Denton says: That's not going to get us a ride, man.

Robert says: (with shotgun) You assholes do exactly what I say or I will take you outside and FUCK YOU IN THE STREET!

Robert says: [with shotgun] You assholes do exactly what I say or I will take you outside and FUCK YOU IN THE STREET!

Saul Silver says: No, don't do that.

Dale Denton says: Don't fuck us anywhere.

Ricky Danforth says: I like your...boobs.

Ricky Danforth says: I like your boobs.

Mantis says: I cant feel my face

Mantis says: I can't feel my face.

Kyle says: Of course she doesn't like to. No one likes putting a dick in their mouth.

Zack says: Miriam Linky, will you have sex with me on camera for money?

Dr. Cockroach Ph.D. says: [To Susan Murphy (now Ginormica)] As you can see,..he has no brain.

Dr. Cockroach Ph.D. says: [to Susan Murphy (now Ginormica)] As you can see...he has no brain.

B.O.B. says: Turns out, you don't need one!

Paul says: What's new, fatty?

Clive Gollings says: It's not fat, Paul, it's power. So rude!

Zack says: give me two popsicle sticks and a rubber band and i'll find a way to fuck it, like a filthy magiver.

Zack says: You give me a two popsicle sticks and a rubber band and I'll find a way to fuck it like a filthy MacGyver.

Kyle says: Did he say I was a dick? 'Cause I'm not.

Kyle says: Who found it?

Adam says: (Sarcastically)My cleaning lady found it in the back of my jeans..who do you think found it?!?

Adam says: [sarcastically] My cleaning lady found it in the back of my jeans..who do you think found it?

Kato says: I donâ??t want to talk. I barely speak English.

Kato says: I don't want to talk. I barely speak English.

Britt Reid/The Green Hornet says: Youâ??re speaking English right now!

Britt Reid/The Green Hornet says: You're speaking English right now!

Britt Reid/The Green Hornet says: The Green Hornet and his reliable partner. The Blue Wombat.

Britt Reid/The Green Hornet says: The Green Hornet. His reliable partner, the Blue Wombat.

Officer Michaels says: Prepared to be fucked by the long dick of the law!

Zack says: Brandon is the star of such adult fare as...what was it?

Zack says: Brandon is the star of such adult fare as... what was it?

Brandon says: You Better Shut Your Mouth Before I Fuck It

Brandon says: You better shut your mouth before I fuck it.

Morton says: The kangaroo has gone mad. She's telling everyone that you think there are people living on specks. She even went to Vlad!

Horton says: Vlad..I know two Vlads: the bad Vlad and the bunny that makes cookies!

Horton says: Vlad.. I know two Vlads: the bad Vlad and the bunny that makes cookies!

Morton says: Yeah, Horton, she's sending you a bunny with cookies.

Paul says: It’s pretty strong shit, I got it from the military, actually. This is the stuff that killed Dylan.

Paul says: It?s pretty strong shit, I got it from the military, actually. This is the stuff that killed Dylan.

Paul says: It's pretty strong shit, I got it from the military, actually. This is the stuff that killed Dylan.

Graeme Willy says: Bob Dylan’s not dead.

Graeme Willy says: Bob Dylan?s not dead.

Graeme Willy says: Bob Dylan's not dead.

Paul says: Isn’t he?

Paul says: Isn't he?

Cal says: u gotta hummer from the tranny didn't ya

Cal says: You got a hummer from the tranny, didn't you?

Cal says: she likes u man

Cal says: She likes you, man.

David says: too bad i retired my penis

David says: Too bad I retired my penis.

Andy Stitzer says: hold my hand

Andy Stitzer says: Hold my hand.

Cal says: r u kidding me man

Cal says: Are you kidding me?

Andy Stitzer says: hold my goddamn hand man

Andy Stitzer says: Hold my goddamn hand, man!

Cal says: u know whats a fun game u take 3 excedrin pms and u see if u can wack off before u fall asleep.u always win..is the best part about the game

Cal says: You know what's a fun game? You take 3 excedrin pms and u see if u can wack off before u fall asleep.u always win..is the best part about the game

Cal says: You know what's a fun game? Take 3 Excedrin PM's and see if you can whack off before you fall asleep. You always win, that's the best part about the game

Cal says: You know what's a fun game? Take 3 Excedrin PM's and see if you can whack off before you fall asleep. You always win, that's the best part about the game.

B.O.B. says: Wait, is it the whole "there isn't a jar in the world I can't open" thing again? Did you find a jar you couldn't open? Did it have pickles in it? Where is the giant jar of pickles!?!?!?!

B.O.B. says: Wait, is it the whole 'there isn't a jar in the world I can't open' thing again? Did you find a jar you couldn't open? Did it have pickles in it? Where is the giant jar of pickles!?

Kyle says: You could have totally fucked the shit out of that girl.

Kyle says: You could have totally fucked the shit out of that girl.

Adam says: No one wants to fuck me. I look like Voldemort....

Adam says: No one wants to fuck me. I look like Voldemort.

Paul says: I'm not gonna eat a DEAD bird, am I?

Zack says: We're gonna have a lot of fun, but more importantly we're gonna make a lot of money

Zack says: We're gonna have a lot of fun, but more importantly we're gonna make a lot of money.

Paul says: Oh yeah! Then how do you explain me? (Coming out of the bathroom and making Ruth faint)

Paul says: Oh yeah! Then how do you explain me? [coming out of the bathroom and making Ruth faint]

Paul says: Hello, I'm Paul. (Clive faints)

Paul says: Hello, I'm Paul. [Clive faints]

Saul Silver says: Its out bro. Monkey's out of the bottle man!

Dale Denton says: What!?

Dale Denton says: What?

Saul Silver says: Yeah!

Dale Denton says: Thats not even an expression!!

Dale Denton says: Thats not even an expression!

Paul says: This is America; kidnapping a Christian? That's worse than harboring a fugitive!

Paul says: I think we can all learn a lesson from this. Be yourself, speak from the heart, some shit like that.

Paul says: Well it's safe to say we've all learned something from this, be yourself, speak from your heart, some shit like that...

Paul says: This ship takes off very fast, its a little awkward!!

Paul says: This spaceship takes off really slowly. It's a little awkward.

Clive Gollings says: I'm starving...

Clive Gollings says: I'm starving.

Paul says: What's new, fatty?

Clive Gollings says: It's not fat, Paul, it's power. You're so rude...

Clive Gollings says: It's not fat, Paul. It's power. You're so rude.

Cal says: You know how I know you're gay? I saw you make spinach dip in a loaf of sourdough bread once.

Cal says: You know how I know you're gay?

David says: How?

Cal says: I saw you make a spinach dip in a loaf of sourdough bread once.

Paul says: Stoke the fire!

Adam says: You really think that a girl is going to go for me just 'cause I have cancer?

Kyle says: For the millionth time. YES!

Kyle says: If you were a casino game, you would have the best odds.

Dale Denton says: WOW! The f#ck was that?

Dale Denton says: Whoa! What the fuck was that?

Saul Silver says: I tired to hit that tree and I missed.

Saul Silver says: I was trying to hit that tree. I missed.

Dale Denton says: What tree?!

Dale Denton says: What tree?

Dale Denton says: That one.

Saul Silver says: That one.

Dale Denton says: Why don't you smash it on a rock like a normal person? Like I did.

Dale Denton says: Why didn't you smash it on a rock like a normal person like I did?

Saul Silver says: How often does somebody smash things? I'm rusty.

Saul Silver says: I don't know! How often does somebody smash things? I'm rusty, fuck.

Saul Silver says: I don't know! Call your phone.

Dale Denton says: What?! My phone has been smashed.

Ronnie Barnhardt says: I love tango after midnight.

Paul says: Clive likes boning space bears.

Paul says: [sings] Clive likes boning space bears!

Paul says: Get your goddamn hands off my motherfuckin junk!!!

Paul says: [after getting frisked inappropriately by O'Reilly] Get your goddamn hands off my motherfuckin' junk!

Paul says: I'm not gonna eat a dead bird, am I?

Britt Reid/The Green Hornet says: It's not dying that you need be afraid of, it's never having lived in the first place.

Graeme Willy says: Are you gonna probe us?!

Graeme Willy says: Are you gonna probe us?

Paul says: Why does everyone always assume that?! What am I doing? harvesting farts?! How much can I learn from an ass?!

Hogsqueal says: Fly as you want. Griffin! I swallowed an ogre whole. You could be next!

Hogsqueal says: Fly as you want. Griffin! I swallowed an ogre whole. You could be next!

Tigress says: If he's smart he won't come back up those stairs.

Monkey says: But he will.

Viper says: He's not going to quit, is he?

Mantis says: I'll tell you what, he's not gonna quit bouncing.

Paul says: Why are we holding hands?

Graeme Willy says: So we look like a family. Just a couple of regular guys walking down the street...with a small cowboy.

Graeme Willy says: So we look like a family. We're just a couple of regular guys, walking down the street, with a small cowboy.

Graeme Willy says: So we look like a family. Just a couple of regular guys, walking down the street, with a small cowboy.

Mantis says: I never thought I'd die this way. I always thought I'd find a nice girl; we'd settle down... and then she'd eat my head.

Mantis says: I didn't think I would die like this. I thought it would end with me settling down with a nice girl. She would bite my head off.

Zack says: SWALLOW MY COCKACCINO!

Zack says: Swallow my Cockaccino.

Mantis says: I didn't think I would die like this!! I thought I would settle down, then have my wife bite my head off..

Mantis says: I didn't think I would die like this. I thought it would end with me settling down with a nice girl. She would bite my head off.

Mantis says: I never thought I'd die this way, I always tought I would settle down with a nice girl and she would eat my head.

Mantis says: You know I never had daddy problems, maybe it was because my mom ate his head before I was born, I don't know.

Cal says: I touched a guy's balls once in Hebrew School.

Bubbles says: Can he slap that ass a little

Bubbles says: Can he slap her ass a little?

Zack says: Don't be a perv!

Zack says: Don't be a fucken pervert dude!

Zack says: I apologise in advance if I am out of line here, but are you in gay porn?

Brandon says: Guilty as charged

Brandon says: Guilty as charged.

Tigress says: Where's Po?

Mantis says: How can we lose a guy that big?