Son of Sam (2008)
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Critic Reviews for Son of Sam
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Audience Reviews for Son of Sam
Alright,so I went into hoping for an improvement over the 1999 steaming pile of crap that Ulli Lommel movie with the same name.Now I did get an improvement,but that's not saying much.That's like saying Epic Movie is better than Meet the Spartans.Yeah,the movie is still an abomination,and really angered me watching it.There's a few good things here and there,but where exactly is "here" and "there"? Just scattered across the movie.Now to get something out of the way that I think a lot of people should expect.If you don't know who the Son of Sam is,just check the my review for the 1999 Son of Sam movie.I'm not willing to explain the story again.If you want a fully detailed version,just use Wikipedia.Now that we've got that out of the way,let's just get into the movie,because there's more than enough I want to complain about. Once again,the plot revolves around the notorious serial killer (Who is now in jail for life) who called himself the Son of Sam.The name comes from the dog who supposedly spoke to the killer.The neighbor's dog oddly enough.Now,the killer struck several times.The Summer that he struck is now often referred to as the "Summer of Sam".The movie is sorta told in Ulli Lommel's normal Docudrama-style.I'm going to give credit right of the bat and say that this is a massive improvement over the 1999 movie (This is not a remake by the way).It's still bad,but it is a helluva lot more straightforward and not as flimsy.I'm going to come down very hard on one thing.The pacing is total shit.It's the equivalent of watching a slug race at the Daytona 500.One lap down...four hundred and ninety-nine to go.I could have sworn that the movie was moving this slow just so Ulli Lommel could make a box set entitled "The Slow Paced Murder Series".If you hate slow pacing,then you better hope that curiosity doesn't take you over and you watch this movie.It's slower than learning about the stock market.Unless you learn from the abridged version.Which is also slow.Despite that,the movie is at least more well structured.I will alert you early on that this is the only time I can really praise this movie.Now it's time to flick on my anger switch. I'm not even gonna slow down for you guys,let's jump into probably the movies biggest offense.The directing by Ulli Lommel is sloppy.Ever wonder what would happen if a Sloppy Joe was made by someone who's had an atrocious day? Well,this would be the directing.A Sloppy Joe that's just slammed on and covers half your plate in meat and the everything else in one.No doubt the meat also splattered on to you too.That's the directing.It's ungodly sloppy and it is all over the place.Half the time,it's trying to build up an atmosphere that doesn't work.Just,for a moment,imagine an awful time at any food joint.Everything in your order is just wrong.There,that's the directing.It's sloppy and it's all wrong.Half the time,it's trying to build up atmosphere.It fails because something completely out of the tone it's trying to also build is wrong.It's always contradicting itself,and it never-ever stops doing that.Not only does it not allow itself to build up any form of atmosphere,it also becomes incredibly annoying.It's aggravating and it eventually becomes distracting.Instead of being interested at the events that are aspiring,you're more fixated on the awful directing.It is amateurish beyond your wildest dreams.I won't say I can do better,but I sure as hell can do a better job keeping a tone to something! I'd comment on how focused the movies directing is,but all I can say is that it's okay.I'd expect nothing more or less from someone who can not build atmosphere to fit with the events of the movie,only to have the current tone wage war against the building of the atmosphere.I do not need to sum this up or even make an over all statement.My anger and burning rage does it for me. So,onto the movies so called dialogue.It's a plus in some ways...but then along comes the second half of the movie.For the first of the dialogue,it's brisk and gets to the point.That may seem very kind,but I went in with extremely low expectations because the other movies have had extremely awful and eat gratingly annoying dialogue.Now,they don't do a damn thing when it comes to the character development.They pretty much just slapped it on there like a "Fragile package" sticker.They do it very slowly,and very "carefully".To bad this is a movie about a serial killer,so when they are trying to develop one character,another one dies and we know squat about him or her.So it's one or the other.The writers argued and then just decided to smash the two together to make an abomination that's called the second half of this movie.Which is nothing but a mess of dialogue I'd expect in a Paul W.S. Anderson movie.It's a feast for your ears.You'll either cringe at the second half of the movies dialogue,or you're going to laugh your ass off at it.I personally did both.I laughed more though.Honestly,the dialogue is comedic bull crap.It doesn't pass or fail.At least they accomplished a little something though.I can give a small point to that I guess.Especially since this movie could use a pat on the back for making me friggin' laugh. Character wise,I give a lot of credit to the movie for having the nerve to actually credit any form of characters.It's very difficult to comment on a movie with almost no characters.I'll be honest though,this was entertaining to think up a few little gags.For example,the movies characters are practically invisible.Oh what wonderful irony,because they pretty much aren't.No,not the lighting.No,not the fact it's stick figures.The answer is that I could barely tell weather this was accidentally filmed,or if the actors are just this God awful at acting.Some may find Sy-Fy Originals to have awful characters.This makes Dinoshark's characters look like the amazingly pulled off characters in any Stanley Kubrick movie.I have no regrets for mentioning him in this review,because this "movies" review could use a bit of class to it.Where was I again? Oh right,the characters.Breaking the fourth wall,I actually forgot.And to tell the truth,I actually forgot where I was when writing this! I really can't tell you more than the characters just don't exist.They are just stick figures.Invisible stick figures.Invisible stick figures that are full of awfulness.The only positive is the fact that the Son of Sam chews the scenery and is so laughable and unbelievably awful that all he needs is a twirly mustache.Aside from him,it's just a load of garbage.Over all,just awful characters.Even if the Son of Sam needs a twirly mustache.If he had one,I'd give this movie a perfect score. This movie has some very bad acting.I won't really complain as much as I will just straightforward with how bad it is.For starters,it's not clear weather to say everyone overacts or underacts.It's an odd,but very irritating,mixture of the two.I'll give credit,there aren't overreactions or under reactions.Instead,we just get an irritating mixture of two very annoying things (Sy-Fy Originals have mastered the art of awesome over acting).Moving on,the acting slowly becomes more stable as the movie goes on.It's just to friggin' bad that the movie isn't that long! Maybe if the movies improvement didn't take so damn long to actually just simply get to the third act with some okay acting,I'd be kinder and give the movie a higher score.However,it takes so long to get to a more stable environment to actually get my attention again,there's only a measly ten minutes until the movie ends.Why it takes so long is a mystery to me,but I could care less.The delivery of the dialogue actually starts out mediocre.That's a plus.However,it rapidly becomes painfully mediocre,and eventually just becomes annoying to listen to.Over all,awful acting.No more,no less.I'd like to go into more detail,but the details are as interesting as learning Math.At least in my book,that's like being hit with a hammer. Son of Sam lacks something that strangely enough,feels vital.It has no real suspense or intensity! What the hell!? Where the writers running out of time to write a script,so they couldn't just ask for some generic sounding music that makes for an intense and suspenseful-feeling atmosphere? Shame on you writers for being that damn lazy.Also,I noticed that whenever there is the slightest bit of any form of real atmosphere,it just dies.They waste it on something very low in shock value,and then just wait for another chance.The lack of any real atmosphere is pathetic,and I blame the director on this.Nobody else,I point every damn finger at Ulli Lommel.He wastes so much fucking time wasting whatever chance he gets to make for even the smallest shock moment that it's almost shameful.It's borderline insulting,and makes for one of the laziest movies ever made.I can not stress enough at how awful this is,and how must worse it gets as I type this! As the movie goes on,and as the movie gets more and more desperate for suspense or any more of intensity,it just pretty much gives up,throws up it's hands,and the movie ends with a horrendous ending.Over all (Yeah,I'm getting tired of typing),the movies lack of any real suspense and intensity makes for a movie about two turtles racing to get across the road while there are hundreds of cars speeding along.But we are more focused on how clouds are made. Between me just being flat out lazy on writing this review,the movie being lazy for taking the cheap mans way out to make a good movie,and my fingers beginning to hurt,I can conclude that this movie is worthy of being beaten to a pulp.You aren't going to get an entertaining movie,but you sure as hell will get your money's worth of anger and/or boredom.I'll admit,it's a massive improvement over the 1999 borefest,but that's being really kind.This movie is still a heaping pile of goat shit on top of a junkyard-sized turd after someone ate twenty burrito's.Is it worth taking that,or taking the same thing,but twice as large.Either way,you lose.The 2007 Son of Sam get's a 1 out of 10.I give a point to the fact the plot is better and the fact I laughed a bit while listening to the inane dialogue.But is that one,single,lonely point worth taking the chance? If so,then do not even bother saying that I did not warn you!
Sub-indie bullshit wanna-be horror flick. But wait, it gets worse: Holy shit! This was miserably bad. At first I thought it might have been an alright movie, but the editor was mentally retarded, but I changed my mind. This was pretty shit no matter how it was cut. The acting was really bad. Some of the worst I've seen. They used 'special effects' if you want to call it that, which really was just hitting the buttons on the camera to make it negative, grainy, ext. Those effects were cool when I was in middle school, but not for a movie. They completely shit on any kind of reality that involved the incidents. And if you think this movie can't get much worse; they say "son of Sam. Son of the devil.' Over and over and over again in the back of every scene in a 1990s Halloween cassette tape kind of way. So, yeah. I'd be fair to say this is the worst movie ever, or at least up there. It's not even an enjoyable laugh at the bad-ness, it's just shit.
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