Sep 18, 2014
You know, if it was up to me, I'd have switched the characters Nicki Minaj and Kate Upton played. I'd make Kate the assistant and Nicki the third woman this guy is lying to. I say that because, while Kate Upton is physically very attractive, she literally has the charisma of a bag of rocks. She could've been much worse, but there's literally no life behind her eyes. She may as well have been a robot and I wouldn't have noticed. Nicki Minaj, on the other hand, certainly has SOME charisma. I didn't think she was great either, but she was definitely better than Kate Upton. And, the fact of the matter is, that Nicki Minaj has a better body, overall, than Kate Upton, this point can't even be argued, so they could've still done the reveal where Carly and Kate lose their shit over how hot this woman is. Problem is that the film wants to create a sisterly bond between these three women who've all been lied to by this manipulative and cheating asshole, but they probably KNEW that Kate Upton wasn't that good so they kept her away from that for as much as possible. So, because of that, it's really hard to buy that these three have bonded in such a way that they made a negative, being cheated and lied to by the same guy, into a positive, a sisterly bond that will stand the test of time. It MIGHT have worked if it was just Kate and Carly, but the fact they tried to make it about the three of them, was really stretching it. This film, really, is no good either. It wouldn't surprise me if this started as something more serious, like how Kate deals with Mark's infidelities and how Kate's feelings for Mark have an effect on how she handles the situation, but it probably got diluted and simplified until you have something that doesn't even resemble the original script. Because there was potential here with this story, but it was sacrificed in order to have a movie with more mass appeal. And I get it, that's perfectly fine. But, as they say, no risk no reward. I'd like to say that they waste a talented cast, but I've never really been that big a fan of Cameron Diaz, Kate Upton is there because she's beautiful, and Nicki Minaj is Nicki Minaj. The only two people I'd suggest were wasted on this film would be Leslie Mann and Nikolaj Coster-Waldau. I thought both Leslie and Nikolaj were good in their roles, but I wished the film had been a little more substantive than it was. Nikolaj probably gave me the only legit laughs I got from the film, and why this gets 1 star, when he's finally confronted by Kate, Carly, and Amber and his subsequent breakdown when they, rightfully, fuck him over is pretty great. I was certainly surprised because while the film did have a lot of slapstick and broad attempts at humor, which is cheap in and of itself, Nikolaj got some legitimate laughs out of me. Perhaps nothing laugh-out-loud worthy, but he made me laugh nonetheless. And I like Leslie because she's, really, the only sympathetic character in the entire film. Not to say the other women are unlikable, but she's the one that's really struggling to reconcile the man she fell in love with versus the man he currently is, one who uses women and doesn't really care whose heart he breaks as long as he gets what he wants. That's why I think this started as something more serious, before it got eaten up by Hollywood. There's still hints of that here, but not enough to make this improve the final cut of the film that we ended up with. It's certainly something that will appeal to some people, but it didn't really do anything for me. Of course, this is gonna bring out the 'it wasn't meant for you' contingent, which is one of the silliest things a person can say to counter someone else's opinion. A good movie is a good movie regardless of what demographic it is meant for. So that's where I leave it. A couple of talented actors have their talents wasted in this film, but it's not like I lost my mind over this film. I wasn't horrifically offended by how terrible it was. But it is a pretty bad movie, but this can be traced back to how poorly written it truly is. That's the main problem with the film, the poor scripting. The cast, for the most part, is fine and it has its moments, but the script is just absolutely dreadful and doesn't reach its full potential. I can't, in good conscience, recommend this film at all. It's just no good at all.
Verified