Underworld Reviews

Page 1 of 2
Top Critic
June 24, 2006
These vampires have no teeth -- hell, they don't even fly.
September 25, 2003
'Your incompetence is most taxing,' says the chief vampire (Bill Nighy). A line that pretty much nails this rusty Blade.
September 24, 2003
The sort of movie in which the head vampire telegraphs his evil by using a cell phone and dressing like the Kinks' Ray Davies in the early '80s.
September 24, 2003
Dark Shadows for the Playstation 2 generation.
September 22, 2003
I've been waiting a long time to see a Shakespearean werewolf vampire movie and here it is.
September 20, 2003
125 minutes is a long time to stare at a movie that's basically in bleached blue-and-white with occasional splotches of brick red.
September 20, 2003
By any reasonable standard, this dark vampire epic -- all massive overacting, cologne-commercial design and sexy cat suits -- sucks.
September 19, 2003
It needs a wooden stake and a silver bullet through its script.
September 19, 2003
For all its slick, neo-noir style, Underworld brings very little that's new to a hoary genre, except for the cliches and conventions of other hoary genres.
September 19, 2003
Features some of the year's most laughable dialogue.
September 19, 2003
Wiseman ... seems vastly more concerned with making a fashion statement than scaring the bejesus out of us.
September 19, 2003
A weirdly compelling blend of corny sentiment and bloodthirsty ballet.
September 19, 2003
Could use script transfusion, or at least a few quarts of levity.
September 19, 2003
Somewhere out there, Dracula is turning over in his grave.
September 19, 2003
Pure hooey, but it certainly has a sense of humor (at least it seems like humor).
September 19, 2003
The whole thing's more art-directed than directed, and the actors are clearly on their own.
September 19, 2003
Sometimes talent and good looks just aren't enough -- [Beckinsale] lacks the movie star presence needed to give life to a supernatural hero in a B-genre film.
September 19, 2003
The movie is stylish and cruel, and mightily entertaining for certain covens out there.
September 19, 2003
A vampire film for the new millennium -- bold, galvanizing and darkly stylish.
September 19, 2003
It's hard to recall a more sexless vampire flick.
Page 1 of 2