Movie Reviews Only

T-Meter Title | Year
5/10 67% The Lovebirds (2020) The Lovebirds may unite two comedic heavyweights but always feels like its punching above its weight class (which is a commentary on scripted shortcomings, I assure you). - We Got This Covered EDIT
Read More | Posted May 21, 2020
1.5/5 No Score Yet The Haunted (2020) Maybe there's a better way to tell David Holroyd's The Haunted, but this navigation surely won't raise the dead (or a single hair). - Flickering Myth EDIT
Read More | Posted May 19, 2020
4/5 93% Monstrum (2018) Monstrum amicably blends ferocious folklore with city-threatening "animals" with martial arts madness. - Flickering Myth EDIT
Read More | Posted May 18, 2020
6/10 51% Scoob! (2020) Scoob! is an enjoyable-enough start to the Hanna-Barbera cinematic universe, but may leave Mystery Inc. superfans feeling robbed of the Scooby-centric reboot that such a title suggests. - We Got This Covered EDIT
Read More | Posted May 15, 2020
3/5 57% Diablo Rojo PTY (2019) The seams may show but Panama's first horror feature is a representative funhouse filled with wicked brujas, gigantic demon puppets (à la Evil Dead), and one blood-soaked highway to Hell. - Flickering Myth EDIT
Read More | Posted May 13, 2020
.5/5 No Score Yet Creepy Tales of Pizza and Gore (2014) Satiates our craving for pizza-themed horror like a Domino's pie that replaces every ingredient with oven-fired Play-Doh. - Flickering Myth EDIT
Read More | Posted May 11, 2020
3/5 91% A Good Woman Is Hard to Find (2020) [A Good Woman Is Hard To Find] is a familiar interpretation of an exploitative revenge model that's ten-thousand-percent elevated by lead actress Sarah Bolger. - Flickering Myth EDIT
Read More | Posted May 11, 2020
3/5 100% Z (2019) A simple moniker for a simple monster, and simple take on paranormal play pals who demand attention at all costs. - Flickering Myth EDIT
Read More | Posted May 11, 2020
.5/5 No Score Yet Human Zoo (2020) Human Zoo is an unconscionable failure from beginning to what the film defines as its "end." - Flickering Myth EDIT
Read More | Posted May 9, 2020
1/5 50% Evil Little Things (2020) Evil Little Things steps to the plate with three anthological chances to hit "creepy dolly horror" out of the park, but whiffs every time like a blind designated hitter. - Flickering Myth EDIT
Read More | Posted May 7, 2020
1.5/5 No Score Yet Rootwood (2020) Have you seen any single example of a found footage flick set in thick forest isolation? Then you've seen Rootwood. - Flickering Myth EDIT
Read More | Posted May 5, 2020
2.5/5 No Score Yet The Jack in the Box (2020) The Jack In The Box boasts a righteous concept, better "exhibit of the cursed" appeal, but doesn't deliver horror's next "killer object that should not be" classic. - Flickering Myth EDIT
Read More | Posted May 3, 2020
3.5/5 100% Mutant Blast (2019) It was at the point where a human-sized lobster in a business suit squared off against the dolphin with a katana that MUTANT BLAST won me over. - Flickering Myth EDIT
Read More | Posted May 1, 2020
2/5 No Score Yet 0.0 Mhz (2019) A too-familiar blend of GONJIAM: HAUNTED ASYLUM and EXTE with some frustratingly lackluster hair-everywhere effects. - Flickering Myth EDIT
Read More | Posted Apr 29, 2020
3/5 73% The Wretched (2020) The Wretched is an accessible brand of soilborne horror that serves up tasty folklore bites throughout a less cohesive but still enjoyable full-course meal. - Flickering Myth EDIT
Read More | Posted Apr 29, 2020
7/10 91% Blood Quantum (2019) Blood Quantum mixes fresh subgenre ideas with dependable and messy zombie gore for a successful balance of guts and glory. - We Got This Covered EDIT
Read More | Posted Apr 28, 2020
6/10 68% Extraction (2020) Extraction is an overstuffed rescue mission that delivers heart-racing action but never keys into any further development beyond the sum of corpses on your screen. - We Got This Covered EDIT
Read More | Posted Apr 25, 2020
1/5 No Score Yet Ouijageist (2018) If you title your film Ouijageist, your movie better gosh-darn-diddly-dokilly be about a motherflippin' "Ouijageist." Spoiler: you'll never see one. - Flickering Myth EDIT
Read More | Posted Apr 24, 2020
2/5 82% 1BR (2020) Cultish intentions are torpedoed by a hasty and unbalanced third act that undoes whatever previous character development exists. - Flickering Myth EDIT
Read More | Posted Apr 24, 2020
1.5/5 No Score Yet Girls Just Wanna Have Blood (2020) I get that sometimes we're looking for nothin' but a good time, but unfortunately, it does get better than this. - Flickering Myth EDIT
Read More | Posted Apr 20, 2020
2/5 80% Antrum: The Deadliest Film Ever Made (2019) Antrum promises a hellfire-kissed passageway to the devil's door, but ultimately keeps viewers in the doghouse. - Flickering Myth EDIT
Read More | Posted Apr 18, 2020
7/10 88% Mortal Kombat Legends: Scorpion's Revenge (2020) Scorpion's Revenge is a punishing deathmatch that embraces Mortal Kombat's interdimensional hellscape appeal. It's heavy on epic fatalities and even heavier on animated action exhilaration. - We Got This Covered EDIT
Read More | Posted Apr 15, 2020
3/5 70% Butt Boy (2020) If you're going to watch one movie this year about the chaos caused by a neverending bum chute, make it this one. - Flickering Myth EDIT
Read More | Posted Apr 15, 2020
.5/5 No Score Yet The Zombinator (2012) The Zombinator is what happens when filmmakers assume "found footage" is a shortcut to horror success. - Flickering Myth EDIT
Read More | Posted Apr 15, 2020
2.5/5 8% Behind You (2020) Behind You may not have viewers peering over their shoulders for a prolonged duration out of passed-on paranoia, but intro-level horror fans will find their shrieks in this "killer in the mirror" indie. - Flickering Myth EDIT
Read More | Posted Apr 14, 2020
7.5/10 86% Blood Machines (2019) The sweetest optical candy your eyes can ingest. - Slashfilm EDIT
Read More | Posted Apr 13, 2020
4/5 97% Why Don't You Just Die! (Papa, sdokhni) (2020) Why Don't You Just Die! showcases exquisite navigation of budgetary constraints, breakneck commital to consequential abandon, and it beats the ever-smug hell out of the flabbier competition. - Flickering Myth EDIT
Read More | Posted Apr 10, 2020
1.5/5 50% The Perished (2019) A sensation of deflation persists even during the film's most "climatic" moments, torpedoing somber moods while negating forward momentum. - Flickering Myth EDIT
Read More | Posted Apr 8, 2020
2/5 82% She's Allergic to Cats (2016) It's funky enough to confound but underdeveloped as larger messages fail to resonate beyond fetish-and-fur montages doused in hyperallergic sadness. - Flickering Myth EDIT
Read More | Posted Apr 8, 2020
3/5 72% The Other Lamb (2020) A visually arresting take on "coming of age" under cultish, alarming circumstances. - Flickering Myth EDIT
Read More | Posted Apr 3, 2020
2/5 72% Vivarium (2020) Vivarium is an abstract dissection of mankind's obsessions with family-style entrapment, belabored by uninspired overtness. - Flickering Myth EDIT
Read More | Posted Mar 28, 2020
3/5 93% Saint Maud (2020) Saint Maud is aesthetically brooding, torturously devoted to exploring mankind's most selfish martyrdoms, and, yes, accomplishes that oh-so-blasphemous sainthood bastardization we all love. - Flickering Myth EDIT
Read More | Posted Mar 25, 2020
8/10 82% The Platform (El Hoyo) (2019) The Platform is a multi-tiered assembly of tension, terror and terrible imaginings that, in cake form, would be worth centerpiece window placement in any professional pâtisserie. - We Got This Covered EDIT
Read More | Posted Mar 21, 2020
2/5 73% M.O.M. (Mothers of Monsters) (2020) Performances are on-point, I'm just not positive M.O.M's message prevails given the third act's divisive direction (which did not work for this critic). - Flickering Myth EDIT
Read More | Posted Mar 21, 2020
4/5 No Score Yet She Dies Tomorrow (2020) Amy Seimetz plays by her own rules as if [She Dies Tomorrow] will be the last film she'll ever make (it won't be, no shot). - Slashfilm EDIT
Read More | Posted Mar 19, 2020
3.5/5 100% Drunk Bus (2020) Drunk Bus is an anti-road trip comedy with plenty of mileage. - Slashfilm EDIT
Read More | Posted Mar 19, 2020
3/5 78% The Room (2019) Come for the room's infinite possibilities, stay hooked into a narrative that expands upon the one diversion you least saw coming. - Flickering Myth EDIT
Read More | Posted Mar 19, 2020
5/10 30% Bloodshot (2020) Bloodshot shoots to kill, but with the accuracy of a Stormtrooper - off the mark and leaving much to be desired. - We Got This Covered EDIT
Read More | Posted Mar 11, 2020
8/10 56% The Hunt (2020) The Hunt puts the "F-U" in midnight "fun" as no sides are safe in this middle-finger cultural roast that's as loudly defiant as it is proudly blood-soaked. - We Got This Covered EDIT
Read More | Posted Mar 11, 2020
4/5 89% Swallow (2020) Swallow's ingenuity stems from blurring intentions between an act of defiance and masochistic punishment, which allows appearances to remain deceptively proper (long enough). - Flickering Myth EDIT
Read More | Posted Mar 6, 2020
2/5 40% The Dare (2020) The Dare is a routine and formulaic tale of karmic comeuppance with Saw on the brain. - Flickering Myth EDIT
Read More | Posted Mar 5, 2020
2/5 22% Beneath Us (2020) Beneath Us opts for clunky midnight chills and surface-level satire despite tackling the most marginalized of stories. - Flickering Myth EDIT
Read More | Posted Mar 5, 2020
7/10 92% The Invisible Man (2020) Leigh Whannell's The Invisible Man draws from multiple Blumhouse catalog influences to ensure a chilling monster remake with ferocity and urgency at its core. - We Got This Covered EDIT
Read More | Posted Feb 26, 2020
3/10 9% Brahms: The Boy II (2020) Brahms: The Boy II seems to want nothing to do with its original, which is an odd and detrimental outcome for your direct continuation of Brahms' ongoing story. - We Got This Covered EDIT
Read More | Posted Feb 21, 2020
2/5 57% Camp Cold Brook (2020) Camp Cold Brook left me feeling just that, disconnected and cold. - Flickering Myth EDIT
Read More | Posted Feb 17, 2020
4/10 8% Fantasy Island (2020) From start to finish, Fantasy Island is lacking wicked wonderment and poignant reboot vocality. It isn't worth one ticket to paradise, let alone two. - We Got This Covered EDIT
Read More | Posted Feb 14, 2020
7/10 64% Sonic the Hedgehog (2020) Sonic the Hedgehog blazes by lesser video game adaptations that have thus defined the subgenre's lackluster reputation by succeeding as both a sincere children's film and blue hedgehog origin that fans will applaud. - We Got This Covered EDIT
Read More | Posted Feb 13, 2020
8/10 78% Birds of Prey (And the Fantabulous Emancipation of One Harley Quinn) (2020) Birds of Prey proves that it's no longer a man's world, it's Harley Quinn's - and we should be so lucky. - We Got This Covered EDIT
Read More | Posted Feb 5, 2020
5/10 64% Gretel & Hansel (2020) Gretel & Hansel is a full course meal when it comes to cinematography and production design, but the sleepy, hollow narrative pacing is just too stogy to overcome. - We Got This Covered EDIT
Read More | Posted Jan 30, 2020
1/5 No Score Yet Get Gone (2020) It's a slasher film that only understands the simplest formula of the subgenre - stalk and kill - yet can't even execute such a minimalist horror architecture with staying power. - Flickering Myth EDIT
Read More | Posted Jan 27, 2020