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If you're interested in watching a battle between cockneys and zombies, this is the movie for you.
All Critics (49) | Top Critics (11) | Fresh (37) | Rotten (12) | DVD (2)
You may protest that this is just a splattery feature-length sketch, and you'd be absolutely right. Why not have a laugh at this absurdly trite concept? Aug 2, 2013 | Rating: 2.5/4 | Full Review…
You may protest that this is just a splattery feature-length sketch, and you'd be absolutely right. Why not have a laugh at this absurdly trite concept?
Kyle Smith
As subtle as its title, "Cockneys vs. Zombies" is mildly funny and easily likable. Aug 1, 2013 | Rating: 3/5
As subtle as its title, "Cockneys vs. Zombies" is mildly funny and easily likable.
Jeannette Catsoulis
[Hoene] set out to make a funny, fast-moving gross-out zombie flick, nothing beyond that, and he has succeeded with style. Aug 1, 2013 | Rating: 3.5/5 | Full Review…
[Hoene] set out to make a funny, fast-moving gross-out zombie flick, nothing beyond that, and he has succeeded with style.
Bill Goodykoontz
The oldsters are feisty - a gun-totin' granny is played by Pussy Galore herself, "Goldfinger's" Honor Blackman - but the shtick's as flat as old ale. Aug 1, 2013 | Rating: 2/5 | Full Review…
The oldsters are feisty - a gun-totin' granny is played by Pussy Galore herself, "Goldfinger's" Honor Blackman - but the shtick's as flat as old ale.
Joe Neumaier
"Cockneys vs. Zombies" might as well be "Babies vs. Zombies" or "Cats vs. Zombies" - strictly for addicts who don't care where their undead fix comes from. Jul 31, 2013 | Rating: 2/5 | Full Review…
"Cockneys vs. Zombies" might as well be "Babies vs. Zombies" or "Cats vs. Zombies" - strictly for addicts who don't care where their undead fix comes from.
Robert Abele
Weightless as a bag of crisps, this matinee fare offers more laughs than scares. Jul 30, 2013 | Full Review…
Weightless as a bag of crisps, this matinee fare offers more laughs than scares.
Rob Staeger
There's plenty of good Zombie-genre jokes in the script - for instance, the fact that an old person using a walker can outrun the slow-moving undead - plus LOTS of splatter. Mar 2, 2019 | Full Review…
There's plenty of good Zombie-genre jokes in the script - for instance, the fact that an old person using a walker can outrun the slow-moving undead - plus LOTS of splatter.
Amie Simon
This movie is laugh-out-loud funny. British comedy really lends itself to this genre as their dark sense of humour complements the monstrous situations. Oct 22, 2018 | Full Review…
This movie is laugh-out-loud funny. British comedy really lends itself to this genre as their dark sense of humour complements the monstrous situations.
Sarah Gopaul
Despite the notable genre tropes, Hoene still manages to keep Cockneys vs Zombies fresh. Aug 23, 2018 | Rating: 3/5 | Full Review…
Despite the notable genre tropes, Hoene still manages to keep Cockneys vs Zombies fresh.
Joseph Walsh
Cockneys vs. Zombies doesn't offer much ingenuity in the zombie subgenre, but it's a rather enjoyable movie if you're looking for foul-mouthed, gun-toting octogenarians battling hordes of the undead with a caper twist thrown in for good measure. Jan 8, 2016 | Rating: 3/5 | Full Review…
Cockneys vs. Zombies doesn't offer much ingenuity in the zombie subgenre, but it's a rather enjoyable movie if you're looking for foul-mouthed, gun-toting octogenarians battling hordes of the undead with a caper twist thrown in for good measure.
Heather Wixson
This frantic lark is a bit more clever and a lot more amiable than most of what passes for "zom-com" these days. Aug 26, 2015 | Full Review…
This frantic lark is a bit more clever and a lot more amiable than most of what passes for "zom-com" these days.
Scott Weinberg
Maybe it's me, but after all the bloated, clanging, FX-driven summer tent poles, I'm partial to a gentle genre horror comedy that has gooey guts - but doesn't throw the heart out with the steaming entrails. Oct 31, 2013 | Full Review…
Maybe it's me, but after all the bloated, clanging, FX-driven summer tent poles, I'm partial to a gentle genre horror comedy that has gooey guts - but doesn't throw the heart out with the steaming entrails.
Thelma Adams
No more than a television sketch comedy routine stretched out to movie length and that's all it is. Anglophiles will enjoy working on their English accents. Drinking game fun: 1 shot for every time "sort it all out" is heard. You might not make it to the end. Crisps, anyone?
Super Reviewer
Cockneys versus Zombies -- not much mystery to what this film is about. It's silly and fun, also as the absurd title would suggest. If you're not looking for anything serious, this film is a good way to pass the time.
A gang of inept, would-be bank robbers have their big score interrupted by a zombie apocalypse that threatens the retirement community that houses their East End grandad and his friends. If there's ever been a film title that perfectly sums up its content, it's Cockneys Versus Zombies! I'm sure it conjures up a Guy Ritchie version of Shaun Of The Dead in your mind's eye, and that's exactly what you get. The effects are surprisingly good considering its obvious budget limitations and there are some suitably gory undead kills as well as a few laughs along the way, although it's more mildly amusing than laugh out loud funny. The premise actually has a lot of potential but the script doesn't really have the imagination to do it justice and the jokes are a little hit and miss, but it does have its moments. Cockneys Versus Zombies is nowhere near as witty or inventive as Shaun, but it's head and shoulders above many of its contemporaries such as Doghouse and the like. Not terrific, but not bad at all either.
Don't expect much from this movie and then you may enjoy it! I love Zombies and to introduce them to a cockney great such as Alan Ford what a great premise! theres not much to the Storyline but entertaining enough, its funny and gory i good zombie fest! love the OAP'S!
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