Jesse Hassenger Movie Reviews & Previews - Rotten Tomatoes

Jesse Hassenger

Jesse Hassenger
Jesse Hassenger's reviews only count toward the Tomatometer when published at the following Tomatometer-approved publication(s): Filmcritic.com, PopMatters, AV Club, Time Out, Brooklyn Magazine, The Week

Movie Reviews Only

Rating T-Meter Title | Year Review
B- 84% Alpha (2018) This is a summer movie that feels designed to transport a younger audience somewhere, not just drag them along for whatever PG-13 ride has been deemed kid-friendly by default.‐ AV Club
Read More | Posted Aug 15, 2018
48% The Meg (2018) Director Jon Turteltaub, a longtime hand at live-action Disney movies, doesn't have the ruthlessness required to goose either the suspense or the mayhem of a giant-shark movie. ‐ The Week
Read More | Posted Aug 9, 2018
11% Slender Man (2018) It turns its boogeyman into a generic figure of menace who doesn't feel ready for his moment in the horror movie spotlight.‐ AV Club
Read More | Posted Aug 9, 2018
D+ 62% Dog Days (2018) It's like watching a number of TV shows running simultaneously.‐ AV Club
Read More | Posted Aug 7, 2018
C- 47% Like Father (2018) For the most part, it's barely a comedy at all, first by choice and then for other, more disappointing reasons.‐ AV Club
Read More | Posted Aug 2, 2018
B 82% The Miseducation of Cameron Post (2018) This movie may wander, but Akhavan's attention to perfect little moments is unwavering.‐ AV Club
Read More | Posted Jul 31, 2018
97% Mission: Impossible - Fallout (2018) The Mission: Impossible movies are not emotional experiences, but a visceral expression of Cruise's dogged desire to remain an action star. Even with top-notch filmmakers at the helm, he's become the true auteur of this series. ‐ The Week
Read More | Posted Jul 26, 2018
91% Teen Titans Go! To the Movies (2018) The success of these cartoons comes down to a willingness to reinterpret characters with both visual and thematic adventurousness. ‐ The Week
Read More | Posted Jul 26, 2018
C 83% Puzzle (2018) Turtletaub and his screenwriters lay the borderline-anachronistic details of their heroine's oppressive life on so thick that the movie starts to sag.‐ AV Club
Read More | Posted Jul 24, 2018
B+ 94% Blindspotting (2018) Real-life friends Diggs and Casal must have less of an unstable dynamic than their characters; the two actors wrote Blindspotting together and perform a potentially fraught duet as its leads.‐ AV Club
Read More | Posted Jul 16, 2018
B- 61% Hotel Transylvania 3: Summer Vacation (2018) It's not exactly a Pixar-level examination of complicated family dynamics... But mostly it's a cute, functional story for Tartakovsky to enliven with his style.‐ AV Club
Read More | Posted Jul 9, 2018
B 94% Sorry to Bother You (2018) Sorry To Bother You is often wildly funny, and if its broad arc is familiar stuff about a down-on-his-luck everyman experiencing success but at what cost, at least the plot specifics are unpredictable by dint of Riley's imagination.‐ AV Club
Read More | Posted Jul 2, 2018
64% Sicario: Day of the Soldado (2018) But if making a sequel to Sicario turns distinctive material into another stylish potboiler with an elevated sense of purpose, Sicario 2 at least elevates the craft, especially with the rich blues of Dariusz Wolski's cinematography.‐ The Week
Read More | Posted Jun 28, 2018
51% Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom (2018) Like his other work, Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom is not a great movie. But it's a more inventive bit of ridiculousness than its nostalgia-minded predecessor.‐ The Week
Read More | Posted Jun 21, 2018
D+ 51% Boundaries (2018) Boundaries clearly wants to approximate the messy rhythms of real life. But its way into this material is constant oscillation between broad antics and hopped-up domestic drama.‐ AV Club
Read More | Posted Jun 19, 2018
B- 51% Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom (2018) As a lava-spewing, raptor-training, teeth-gnashing, monster-in-the-basement creature feature, it has a certain freshness.‐ AV Club
Read More | Posted Jun 5, 2018
C+ 20% Action Point (2018) Action Point's nostalgia sunglasses are tinted, but not as dark as they could be, and certainly not clear enough to offer a look at any subtext, even when it's right in front of the filmmakers' faces.‐ AV Club
Read More | Posted Jun 1, 2018
B- 73% Adrift (2018) The movie has a little more up its sleeves, narratively speaking, than first appears, and Kormákur converges the two timelines effectively.‐ AV Club
Read More | Posted May 31, 2018
B 71% Solo: A Star Wars Story (2018) An entertaining two-plus hours.‐ AV Club
Read More | Posted May 15, 2018
C+ 38% Life of the Party (2018) Here, McCarthy commits to a character while the rest of the movie tries on silly disguises.‐ AV Club
Read More | Posted May 10, 2018
A- 86% Tully (2018) But [Jason] Reitman and especially [Diablo] Cody approach the material with the freshness of filmmakers still learning new things about themselves, still figuring out how to reconcile their grown-up selves with who they may have been in youth.‐ AV Club
Read More | Posted Apr 30, 2018
B 23% The Week Of (2018) Smigel may not want to take up permanent residence in the Happy Madison offices, but he raises his old friend's game considerably.‐ AV Club
Read More | Posted Apr 27, 2018
C- 26% Traffik (2018) A watchable semi-terrible exploitation picture...‐ AV Club
Read More | Posted Apr 20, 2018
8/10 No Score Yet Futurama: Bender's Game (2008) This being Futurama, those jokes -- even the silliest ones -- have their weird little complexities.‐ PopMatters
Read More | Posted Apr 19, 2018
14% Blumhouse's Truth or Dare (2018) Instead, director and co-writer Jeff Wadlow often filters the female-friendship material through romantic or sexual rivalries, and the movie is too busy with gossipy, salacious, and weirdly obvious twists to dig into its own psychology.‐ The Week
Read More | Posted Apr 13, 2018
52% Rampage (2018) Even the A-movie budget can't disguise how hollow and insubstantial all of the death and destruction feels, even in action-movie terms.‐ The Week
Read More | Posted Apr 13, 2018
C- 84% Sgt. Stubby: An American Hero (2018) Sgt. Stubby is an odd lesson in how some stories, even stories about world-changing conflicts, are just formless anecdotes stitched together by labored narration.‐ AV Club
Read More | Posted Apr 10, 2018
C- 49% The Miracle Season (2018) It is not unusual for an underdog sports picture to be predictable. But The Miracle Season seems downright preordained, and not just in its arc.‐ AV Club
Read More | Posted Apr 5, 2018
B 83% Blockers (2018) Pretty much everyone in Blockers, right down to one-joke supporting characters, is at least amusing and good-hearted-and maybe, as the movie winds down, just a little too quick to make nice.‐ AV Club
Read More | Posted Apr 3, 2018
B+ 75% Gemini (2018) As visually appealing as much of Gemini is, it wouldn't work nearly so well without Lola Kirke playing Jill.‐ AV Club
Read More | Posted Mar 27, 2018
C 28% Sherlock Gnomes (2018) Is any of this destitute child's Toy Story especially funny or exciting? Oh my, no.‐ AV Club
Read More | Posted Mar 23, 2018
43% Pacific Rim Uprising (2018) If you liked Pacific Rim, you'll probably like Uprising, too. It might even leave a generation of kids wanting more.‐ The Week
Read More | Posted Mar 23, 2018
D 65% I Can Only Imagine (2018) This is an interesting idea, executed with a reductive, tin-eared understanding of what constitutes art to go along with a faith-based movie's reductive, tin-eared understanding of what constitutes entertainment.‐ AV Club
Read More | Posted Mar 16, 2018
B- 40% A Wrinkle in Time (2018) Once A Wrinkle In Time launches into its trippy planet-scapes... it delivers more consistent eye candy, though screenwriters Jennifer Lee and Jeff Stockwell never completely crack L'Engle's storytelling rhythms.‐ AV Club
Read More | Posted Mar 7, 2018
C+ 92% Love, Simon (2018) Love, Simon is touching as a gesture. As entertainment, it's nothing Degrassi hasn't done better.‐ AV Club
Read More | Posted Feb 27, 2018
C+ 63% Every Day (2018) Plotwise, the book is faithful to the novel, but its eventual resolution is insubstantial and unsatisfying, as sometimes happens when story points are dutifully replicated onscreen without accompanying visuals.‐ AV Club
Read More | Posted Feb 22, 2018
B- 47% Red Sparrow (2018) A lavishly costumed, location-enhanced thriller, Red Sparrow carries itself along briskly enough (even with a 139-minute running time, the most indulgent thing about it), but it's never especially brain-twisting or nerve-wracking.‐ AV Club
Read More | Posted Feb 16, 2018
C 17% Looking Glass (2018) More sincere Cage fans will just sigh, take mild solace in his avoiding yet another low-rent revenge thriller, and hope for the best next time around.‐ AV Club
Read More | Posted Feb 13, 2018
C+ 63% Peter Rabbit (2018) It only takes a few minutes for Peter Rabbit to misunderstand its source material twice.‐ AV Club
Read More | Posted Feb 5, 2018
C 8% Basmati Blues (2018) The movie starts out heedless in its desire to charm, but it winds up feeling constrained by self-consciousness, and more's the pity.‐ AV Club
Read More | Posted Feb 5, 2018
B- 42% Maze Runner: The Death Cure (2018) It's watchable, often surprisingly fun, and largely devoid of personality.‐ AV Club
Read More | Posted Jan 25, 2018
D+ 20% Forever My Girl (2018) Wolf is a Louisiana native and obviously loves her location work, but not enough to imbue the writing or visuals with any life.‐ AV Club
Read More | Posted Jan 17, 2018
C+ 60% The Polka King (2017) The cast performs these scenes entertainingly-Black's dancing eyes remain as compelling as ever-without ever transcending how unfocused and flatly shot they are.‐ AV Club
Read More | Posted Jan 10, 2018
91% Phantom Thread (2018) And now Phantom Thread is a half-harrowing, half-tender chamber piece about the nature of love that also pokes, amusingly, at the supposed importance of the Great Artist.‐ The Week
Read More | Posted Dec 28, 2017
D+ 18% Father Figures (2017) The movie torpedoes its sense of comic discovery. It's as if everyone involved can't wait for it all to be over and go home.‐ AV Club
Read More | Posted Dec 21, 2017
C 56% The Greatest Showman (2017) In a broader sense, the mishmash does recall the real Barnum, who once sewed half a fish to half an ape and called it a mermaid.‐ AV Club
Read More | Posted Dec 20, 2017
C 32% Pitch Perfect 3 (2017) With a thinnier, sillier story than ever before, the threequel is left with its twin pillars of appeal: musical performances by the core cast, and shtick, also by the core cast.‐ AV Club
Read More | Posted Dec 20, 2017
67% Wonderstruck (2017) Despite all of the eventfulness, there's little dramatic tension, and lots of footage of kids walking around a museum.‐ Brooklyn Magazine
Read More | Posted Dec 19, 2017
93% Thelma (2017) What keeps it humming is Harboe's performance, and Trier's patience, evident from the very beginning when he takes his sweet time locating Harboe in a vast overhead shot. He hasn't exactly made a horror movie here, but Thelma suggests he could.‐ Brooklyn Magazine
Read More | Posted Dec 19, 2017
95% Call Me by Your Name (2018) Though much of Call Me By Your Name is lovely and well-crafted, it's never quite as subtle as the filmmakers seem to assume.‐ Brooklyn Magazine
Read More | Posted Dec 19, 2017